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OMNICELL
Consumer 6
Consumer 6
 
Posts: 1052
Joined: Tue Nov 15, 2011 5:06 am
Blog: View Blog (1917)
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Relational development; It is beginning to form;
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played my song live first time ever...
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Im a 12 year old who does Art…
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The new road...

Permanent Linkby OMNICELL on Mon Mar 25, 2024 7:26 am

Work and relationships;
.
So; Ive started working on music with the idea of accomplishing songs… Im thinking; Im so dissociated I never stuck to doing anything or finishing anything or creating anything I would actually play in front of others; That may be changing if I can handle sticking to this process of work…
.
I get it; its allot of data and information. But that information is suppose to be worked to a point of creating something with the data and information; and that information and data is turned into my own form of songs; songs of a standard of performance; solid and marketable. They are not suppose to be perfect or polished gold. They are to show a sense of professionalism at a basic solid level; Radio level; NO! Maybe not.. but a solid attempt to create a good song… Something comparable.
.
Im starting to see how I zoned out… its very hard dealing with this data all the time. But Im just barely able to deal with all of this. It requires memorization and allot of work with allot of data… And skills… its a craft!
.
RELATIONSHIPS;
I have to keep working with the Universe on this one. Just nice people. No popular people; no past Cheerleaders from the Football fields of popularity ville. No NO NO… \
.
I never became anything; so I never experienced anything. I was thrown away… So I never met the kind of people I wanted to be around; Nothing… Im now waking up to this fact; and I run it through God and that is all I run it through; no one else.
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So; im starting to get some sense back.
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As for the music; lots of data going through a dissociated avoidant brain. Ill work on it and see what I can do… The goal is to be a musician.
.
For relationships; The goal is to be myself; a nice person and working with God; only attract nice people. I have absolutely no idea what level that is. I don’t know… I don’t know where I fit into.. I have no idea. I don’t know…
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I know where I don’t fit in!
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Getting my identity back will be possible but hard. Im already on that track… Now; it will require allot of work and consistent staying power on this Pathway; this God pathway…
.

.

Dissociative Disorder
CPTSD
AVPD; Social avoidance
Previous/Psychotic clinical Depression
agoraphobia
obsessive/compulsive disorder
Evolution didn't stop my death, God did .....Now what?
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