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I'm divorcing him. by OneEyedWendigo on Fri Oct 17, 2014 4:55 am
... and it hurts like hell.

Dearest of my heart how you have been a leech on my soul. Sucking out every part of me, your poison ebbing through my veins like a river. Your hatred is buzzing through me, filling my thoughts with stinging needles.

I stayed with you five years. Through the stalking, through the threats, through the violence, through the isolation. I begged and pleaded with God until I found there was none. You took all happiness and semblance of normality from my life. A darkness came over me and I laid down to rest one day, and gave up on myself. On our marriage.

You fed me and fattened me. You choked and abused me. You locked me in a cage. How foolish you were. How foolish I was. To think you could keep me.

And now I have gone and left you. I wonder if you care? The flatlined emotions within you, a con man who turns down the gaslight. Will you even miss me when I am gone? Or will you hone in on your next victim?

Our marriage has been a lie. I know that now. To think I could save you, help you, rehabilitate you. As Ingrid Bergman says in Gaslight: "If I were not mad, I could have helped you. Whatever you had done, I could have pitied and protected you. But because I am mad, I hate you. Because I am mad, I have betrayed you. And because I'm mad, I'm rejoicing in my heart, without a shred of pity, without a shred of regret, watching you go with glory in my heart!"

I wont ask for much in the divorce. Not from you. I want nothing but my life. I want nothing but my safety. I want nothing but my freedom.

Keep the car, your things, your status. All of them I give to you in exchange for my soul.

May your next victim bring you much pain and heartache.



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Im tired of writing but have some things to report by OMNICELL on Mon Apr 12, 2021 5:56 am
Ive done allot of writing in a short time; but its really helped and ive moved forward.
Im now officially playing guitar the right way. meaning; seriously inline with the right way to play and study;...

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Intermittent line curves. by highdimensionman on Sun Apr 11, 2021 10:01 pm
Imagine you have two little 3d lines connected now you make the one line equation effect the other line equation more as you graph approachs the point where the two lines intersect. So from 2 lines you...

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My path to VR. by highdimensionman on Sun Apr 11, 2021 12:12 am
First I'll wait until there is a 4030 rtx and DDR 5 available for an itx motherboard so next year or more to the point the year after. Then spend on 3 high capacity 8 or 16 tb ssds, 16 tb M2 and another...

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Where do I fit in within the outside world by OMNICELL on Fri Apr 09, 2021 1:08 am
Ive always been dissociative and never fit into the outside world. Ive never worked; not really; certainly not at anything I would want to; never made choices for myself concerning work... No relationships;...

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Erasing posts; This is the third post Ive erased by OMNICELL on Wed Apr 07, 2021 7:14 am
Progress in working within my imagination concerning my first love.
Ive been able to
1. Walk up to her house knock on the door grab her hands tell her I love her and God loves her
2. Ive...

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Re: Germ warfare by Snaga on Wed Apr 07, 2021 2:00 am
It seems COVID does go after the unfit among us (of which I am one). Older people, those with existing conditions, and overweight are all things it seems to like.

Contrast that with the Spanish Flu of...

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Re: The Death of a fall'n solider by Snaga on Fri Mar 26, 2021 4:42 am
I'm very sorry for your loss, Omnicell.

We can only do our best, as we're able. As you did.

And also, remember that it may be that nothing might have been able to save him. Sometimes a person can't...

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Re: diagnosis and general update by Snaga on Sun Mar 21, 2021 9:01 pm
As well as can be expected- thank you!

Re: diagnosis and general update by exul on Sun Mar 21, 2021 1:27 am
hello and thank you for your concern! having the diagnosis does indeed feel good. we would have never thought it would come a time where our struggles could have a name.
we're stuck in our home country...

[ Continued ]

Re: diagnosis and general update by Snaga on Sun Mar 21, 2021 12:23 am
Hello and welcome back! Glad to hear about the Dx- I know that feels 'good', so to speak, that you have it official now. Hoping you get out of the situation you're in soon- I take it that you will have...

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