Our partner

User avatar
OMNICELL
Consumer 6
Consumer 6
 
Posts: 1052
Joined: Tue Nov 15, 2011 5:06 am
Blog: View Blog (1930)
Archives
- July 2025
Getting close to a new quantum leap into a new area of developme
   Mon Jul 21, 2025 2:45 am
So; I deal with my first interactive crisis
   Sun Jul 20, 2025 5:36 am
Dating support
   Sat Jul 19, 2025 6:12 am
Im a recovery person
   Thu Jul 17, 2025 4:19 am
The new message from God concerning women!
   Mon Jul 14, 2025 10:19 am
Im Building a network support for dating...
   Mon Jul 14, 2025 2:15 am
Setting the intention
   Sun Jul 13, 2025 6:46 pm
Wife; Family; Children; Marriage..
   Sun Jul 13, 2025 8:33 am
I have to start over in 2025.
   Thu Jul 10, 2025 5:04 pm
The next goal is; Dating
   Wed Jul 09, 2025 5:24 am
At this point Im a guy that is 40 years behind…
   Wed Jul 09, 2025 12:58 am
Update to goals; second goals update…
   Tue Jul 01, 2025 6:21 pm

+ June 2025
+ May 2025
+ April 2025
+ March 2025
+ February 2025
+ January 2025
+ December 2024
+ November 2024
+ October 2024
+ September 2024
+ August 2024
+ July 2024
+ June 2024
+ May 2024
+ April 2024
+ March 2024
+ February 2024
+ January 2024
+ December 2023
+ November 2023
+ October 2023
+ September 2023
+ August 2023
+ July 2023
+ June 2023
+ May 2023
+ April 2023
+ March 2023
+ February 2023
+ January 2023
+ December 2022
+ November 2022
+ October 2022
+ September 2022
+ August 2022
+ July 2022
+ June 2022
+ May 2022
+ April 2022
+ March 2022
+ February 2022
+ January 2022
+ December 2021
+ November 2021
+ October 2021
+ September 2021
+ August 2021
+ July 2021
+ June 2021
+ May 2021
+ April 2021
+ March 2021
+ February 2021
+ January 2021
+ December 2020
+ November 2020
+ October 2020
+ September 2020
+ August 2020
+ July 2020
+ June 2020
+ May 2020
+ April 2020
+ March 2020
+ February 2020
+ January 2020
+ December 2019
+ November 2019
+ October 2019
+ September 2019
+ August 2019
+ July 2019
+ June 2019
+ May 2019
+ April 2019
+ March 2019
+ February 2019
+ January 2019
+ December 2018
+ November 2018
+ October 2018
+ September 2018
+ August 2018
+ July 2018
+ June 2018
+ May 2018
+ April 2018
+ March 2018
+ February 2018
+ January 2018
+ December 2017
+ November 2017
+ October 2017
+ September 2017
+ August 2017
+ July 2017
+ June 2017
+ May 2017
+ April 2017
+ March 2017
+ February 2017
+ January 2017
+ December 2016
+ November 2016
+ September 2016
+ August 2016
+ July 2016
+ June 2016
+ May 2016
+ April 2016
+ March 2016
+ February 2016
+ January 2016
+ December 2015
+ November 2015
+ October 2015
+ September 2015
+ August 2015
+ April 2015
+ March 2015
+ February 2015
+ January 2015
+ December 2014
+ November 2014
+ October 2014
+ September 2014
+ August 2014
+ July 2014
+ June 2014
+ May 2014
+ April 2014
+ March 2014
+ February 2014
+ January 2014
+ December 2013
+ November 2013
+ October 2013
+ September 2013
+ August 2013
+ July 2013
+ June 2013
+ May 2013
+ April 2013
+ March 2013
+ February 2013
+ January 2013
+ December 2012
+ November 2012
+ October 2012
+ September 2012
+ August 2012
+ July 2012
+ June 2012
+ May 2012
+ April 2012
+ March 2012
+ February 2012
+ January 2012
+ December 2011
+ November 2011
Search Blogs

Phase 11 #22; Preparing for the future... An Inventory

Permanent Linkby OMNICELL on Thu May 04, 2023 4:43 pm

Goals;
.
1. Car; Ill keep working towards it… I have to believe I can afford it…
.
2. Working through the past; First Love; and when younger; First best friends; Both end up neither my friends or any associate of mine; they are complete strangers with nothing in common with me. I was fooled.
.
The goal is to work with the universe to slowly back away from what I remember of these people; they were not my friends; they were not people I was suppose to ever meet…
.
I have to learn to visualize and slowly move away from them… very slowly… in my imagination…
.
So; I have to have God GREATER; in my mind then they are. I want a relationship with God where I turn to God instead of the memories of these people. I want my love and my decency and my focus on God; not people… And there it is; I have to keep working and asking and seeking God until God is greater to me then the people on earth. I have God as my only source.
.
I was fooled by Jackals because I didn’t know better when I was young; its horrible; to bad and such. However, they were never with God. So; What was I doing around them… They were Godless; They will stay Godless…
.
I have God; I have to work with God; be on my knees to God and ask God to create a better relationship with God; one that is greater and I feel safer and more trustworthy and taken care of; more with God then anyone on earth.
.
I have to learn to be in Gods embrace; And from there; I will attract people, places and things…
.
God first.
.
God must be greater to me then my First Love. And I think that is possible as I continue to work on this stuff… Ill keep on my knees and keep working at it; a relationship with God that I feel safe and loved and taken care of…
.
Ive noticed; The first best friend I had; or thought.. I want away from him in my imagination; He was never my friend; his heart was never with me. God was with me and never asked me to be around people like that..
These people always thought they were superior or better then me to a point of pure hatred toward me… I kind of spiteful superiority.
My Best Friend and the First Girl I fell in love with thought they were superior to me; better then me; thought I was beneath them; White Trash. I was being fooled by them at first… In the end; they are wicked people… They put on a good front at first; I certainly fell for it. I admit; I fell for it! I was fooked; hook line and sinker..
.
More importantly; I needed to get out of there…… Not be friends with these people…
.
Where am I suppose to GO!
.
So; I have to work with the universe to create safe spaces for myself with God in order to start over. I need and want to build a relationship with God greater then the need I feel for my best friend and first love; The lose I felt when they were not around me… I can feel it now.
.
In a sense; its a huge mistake ever missing these people. I guess I miss what it was like being around them when I first met them… But; that was not real; I was being fooled; So; Ill have to go back to God; stay with God; rebuild with God; and God will send me on new journeys…
.
NOTE: I need to imagine I pull away from them from the beginning. I met them; talked to them a few times; and then leave and never return; and instead; begin to imagine a new life without them; one I build on my own with God and who ever God brings to me as guide or helper.
.
So; The first few quests are;
.
1. The continuous work on making God stronger in my life; safer; meaning; Ill turn to God first for safety, care, relationship, safe space; God more important then; First Love. Gods secure presence becomes more of what I focus on… And The lie of the First Love; leaves; leaves; and I don’t care and don’t need it.
.
The individual I had a first love with; she used Fierce loyalty against me. She hooked me into believing she needed someone to save her or care about her emotionally; It was a sick game of a narcissists sociopath. It was all a game… I was convinced or brainwashed that she needed my Fierce loyalty for her to survive… In the end; this was not true. She did not need or want any part of me for any reason. However, to continue to manipulate me; she used this against me. This is what they use as a kind of black mail; it creates a trauma bond with them; they end up throwing scraps at a person… I end up taking them at the time not understanding what is happening…
.
Fierce loyalty; The problem with fierce loyalty; it has a kind of abounding affect upon me; I feel like I have this purpose now in life to safe and love someone; cherish them and adore them. That’s how its used against me. And when Im discarded by the narcissist; Im absolutely stuck; Im in a trauma bond. And Im stuck for life because I have this fierce loyalty brought out in me and for no use now.. no one is around; I got fooled. So; this causes a kind of horrendous loss heartache for someone that never existed.
.
I have to work with God to have a greater relationship and safer feeling relationship with God then with this fake narcissistic person. Ya know; I had both as God; actually; I had her as God; Which one is my God…. Now Im backtracking to worship the real God....
.
Im believing I can create a relationship with God stronger then the fake one I thought I had or was fooled into believing I had with this first love..
.
Thus; Ill be working to have a stronger relationship with God that I believe God more then I believed this first love or believed in this first love.
.
I believed in this first love because I was fooled into believing it… I had no idea I was being defrauded.
.
The point is; it concerning the work with the higher power; that it be a stronger relationship to a point that I hid in my higher power universe Jesus God… Source energy; Energy of the Universe; I hide there and my focus to getting love and getting my needs met and feelings safe is within that realm; I no longer feel a pull that is strong enough to pull me away from a higher power into the arms of a fake false First Love;…. The goal is to put my allegiance into a relationship with a higher power and that be my focus… It means just that; I turn toward my higher power for safety and love; and no longer believe in someone on earth that is going to supply it for me. I have to build a relationship with God at this level; and where all my work aught to be to start with; its about priorities…
.

.


Manifestations;
.
Music; Goal; To feel more free on a daily basis; hourly basis; creating… A kind of Freedom…
.
Art; Same….
.
Car; Believing I deserve it; I can afford a car! Believing this… Thats where the work is.
.
Money; believing I deserve it…
.
Girlfriend; I have to get a much greater relationship with God where God is #1… And It cant be manipulated away by anyone. Ive got to feel safe.. Not feel like someone is going to set me up and rape my personality; Ive been through this to many times… However; I wont be looking for someone like that this time; Ill be in Gods pathways and manifest; and God will bring the right people. But I have to become more then where Im at right now…
.
Vacations…
..
.
So; It all continues.
.
.
.
THE PRESENT:
I think the big issue for me right now is to learn to backtrack away from the fake first best friend when I was a kid; away from the history I remember; God wants me backtracking out of there now; and coming back to God as if I never met that person.
God wants me backtracking away from First Love; as if I never met her… coming back to God…
.
The goal is to see these scumbags for what they were and never ever think again of ever wanting to spend any time with any of them or even think about them in any way ever again…
.
Getting a stronger relationship with God that takes the place of what I thought people were going to give me…
Ive never met the people that were ever giving anything. Ive never manifested anyone in Gods Pathway before; Nice people; the kind I always wanted to meet. That would be the next level when I get there; It will be awhile.
.
Car; Believing I deserve it; and telling myself; “ I Can afford a car”; Doing this kind of work until I really believe it; that is where my work is now. In learning how to believe it before it shows up.

Dissociative Disorder
CPTSD
AVPD; Social avoidance
Previous/Psychotic clinical Depression
agoraphobia
obsessive/compulsive disorder
Evolution didn't stop my death, God did .....Now what?
0 Comments Viewed 5604 times

Who is online

Registered users: Bing [Bot], Google [Bot], Snaga