September 2025
August 2025
My Phase serious is about 2 things...
1. Creating music and performing it live
2. Girlfriend...
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Im working on number 2.
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The first goal is to break away from the first love I had in High School; She has resurfaced in my memories and is causing havoc. She never been gone; only buried... Technically she is gone at this point of work thats been done; she is now gone from my nervous system. Certainly something might appear to remain but its unpleasant... Not something I would take home to Mother; even if Mother is a Witch...
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IVe talked extensively about the frustration of dealing with different segments of the population and how they don't appreciate anything about me. Now; Its time to change...
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DATING:
IF I want to date women; I have to see them as a positive in my mind. I cannot see a picture of every women that did me in; in the past; most of the work concerning those women shows; Im just as much as fault if not more then they are. In many cases; I went out of my way to meet the wrong women; No one came to me. And I never told the truth; No one know who I really was.. I never told anyone.
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So; First; I have to see women in a positive light; thats the next level of work... Im not done getting all my anger out about how Ive been treated in the past but Ive gotten enough out...
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I have to start the process working with God... I have to see the positive in women.. I havent done this; Ive been focusing on the bad in women that Ive met so I dont meet anyone like them ever again. I cant afford it. ALso; I have to learn how adults do these things... How they survive relationships...
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So; the next message is; I have to get a picture in my head of a positive view of women... I have no choice... I really dont or Ill see nothing but negative and the universe will bring me no one...
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God will bring me what I truly want or believe I deserve; if its always negative; Then; I will be brought nothing...
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IVe been around allot of women I dont want; its their personalities.. Fair enough; What am I looking for.
I need to describe the right kind of people to associate with... and work with God on it!
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So; I have to start creating a description of what I like about women; This is going to be scary hard.. Its hard because Im scared; I dont want to end up with anymore 2 faced murder'rs anymore... So...
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Non of the negative things Ive mentioned about women are false. Im not the only one complaining about this insanity. The problem is; Im just about ready to go back out and date people; and that wont work if I hate everyone...
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So; Ive got to see positive traits in women; Actually I see 10000 positive traits in women. I have to believe Im dating someone with no issues... that's going to be hard. So; Ill work with God on it... God can set my mind correctly; setting me up for the future Im interested in.
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So; I have to see women in a positive frame of mind... That will be the next level of work I work on.
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Im not done seeing them for the criminal behaviors I remember; so; Ill be reporting on that as well; slowly that will leave and more positive things will show up...
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If I want someone nice; I have to see someone nice in my head... So; thats where the work is; in my imagination.
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I have to see women as a positive in my mind...
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One of the areas that scares me; I still see my first Love in my mind; Ive done enough work on her; but she is still in the background... So; I dont want someone like her. So; new thoughts have to come up... Ill have to keep working with God on all this...
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I have to see women as a positive in my mind.
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