July 2025
June 2025
Next step for goals is girl friend…
next step for goals; car…
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My minds been ruptured brutally and the affects and damage took me completely offline as a human being when young.
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With massive amount of recovery work for a very long time; on my own… No past family system; Just me and whatever God could find for recovery processes… I am getting better and more inline with my higher power. It reminds me of when I was very very young child but this time; No fake friends; Im alone and on my own… and Ill have to learn how to work with God to get what I want… Work with Success based thinking process God brought to me to learn how to have success in life!
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So; here I am; a little bit stronger… and heading toward developing that confident place called; Im ready to reach out and peruse the dream of Girlfriend and Vehicle. And Ill have to learn how to do this on my own this time… and that means completely starting over.
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How long with this take. Well; With my mind damaged and so weak and barely online; this is a big problem for confidence. Being present and confident is the name of the game. Im already getting there but how long would it take to be ready or up to speed with a broken shattered feeble mind like mine.
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LAWS OF ATTRACTION;
All the success based learning processes…
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A huge gap resides between the time my nervous system and mind were put off line and destroyed; Decapitated;
Well; here I am now.
Im getting very much inline with my original self again but Im like operating at 20 % mental and identity strength. I mean; and that can fall down to 2%. I mean; Im on a disability; so…
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So; The positive point; Im really far forward these days on stuff; meaning; Ive got specific goals. And I can see them as I work on them.
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Because of the damage to my mind and the immaturity of my state and the gap between any real world experience in the real world and the real world; This will take along time to fill in. Its a strait big Gap of no experience between myself and a girlfriend and car. I mean; Its like Im a 6th grader making his way to being 16. At those ages; thats allot of experience.
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Im going from young childhood where no one cared about me; So I didn’t learn anything; and Im heading into a new me.
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And Im walking through brutality when I was thrown away at age 9; and I have to work through those next years; and then some how to gather my wits; and work toward my goals of an Asian girlfriend and a car.
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Asian girlfriend.
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Ive spent number of seasons working with the laws of attraction and no matter what I do; it always ends up the same. I end up with the number one choice for girlfriend is an Asian women for romantic interests and best friend. This is created by God and my inner being. This is their idea and no matter what I do; I cant escape it. I does make things harder….
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Ive done so much work on this subject; that its silly to even spend a second second guessing or questioning my inner being; I know what Gods direction is for me; Asian soulmate; But I have no idea how Im going to get there. And I cant say it any better then that.
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What Asian women are we talking about to be my girlfriend; I don’t know; God knows…
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Lately as Ive worked more on this subject; Suddenly in the center of my mind; And their she is again; An Asian women as the movement forwards in my imagination.
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This actually causes allot of stress. But God will not have it any other way….
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As for Asian women sent to me by God; I don’t know; Ill continue to work with God in my imagination. I must resurrect her in my imagination first. And this is what I was suppose to be learning back in yearly junior high and later junior high and high school. I attempted such things; but I had no one… So it backfired. I got up around the wrong people and was manipulated and destroyed.
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As for all aspects of car; same thing; I must know what car… And then how much. And then imagine the whole thing in my head first; getting paid off first…
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What is needed?
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The first thing that is needed… I have to walk through a full practice process from beginning to end as if I don’t need a girlfriend or a car; meaning; I can live with one or without one; I don’t need them; take it or leave it…
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And the reason? Because I feel I can get one anytime I want; a car or girlfriend; And that is where I start; and that is called confidence… and Im working to accomplish this confidence. It comes first before I meet someone or try to manifest a car.
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And that specific confidence has to be earned back in my life; but that is my direction… It may take many years.
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Ive got a mind full of damage; so; This wont be easy and it wont be a short amount of time; it will take what it takes but Im On it; Im on the direction….
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I have to cross areas of rupturing in my personality… I have to cross the gap and keep growing until my confidence to be in the present gets stronger…
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REMEMBER: when Im strong enough and ready; Ill be facing working with my imagination within my imagination to attract those frequencies; and those frequencies will be sent out to the universe and brought back to make people and places and things take notice… My mind will be filled with new information on who and what and where…. Assuming Im up to speed… I have to get up to speed and match the value of what Im trying to attract…
Ill be ready for it. But Ill have no idea who or what or where accept it will be women of Asian background. If God wants to change that; Im fine with it; it sounds to hard for me. But that is whats shown up in all my Soulmate workshops and tests… No matter what I do; no matter how much I meditate; that is what shows up. And when I pray; I go back and make an inventory; and that is what shows up.
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I would say this would be allot easier if it was just a blond but its not! Its not a blond; its only one thing that God has ordained; she shall be an Asian women.
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Who might it be; Have no idea and it doesn’t matter yet… I have to work on this obstacle course; practice course as if Im able to go from where Im at now; all the way to meeting new people face to face and winning; And I have to practice this obstacle course in my imagination over n over n over until I get stronger and stronger and stronger… This could take several months or years or several years; I don’t know; I know Im damaged; so; it could take several years…
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And when Im ready; Im sure I wont hit the targets the first time; Ill make lots of mistakes and make a fool out of myself until I can get this guidance system honed and working within the constrains of the universe…
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So; I must be strong enough; and I have to do the work first to become strong enough.
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I do have goals and as for future wife; starting with Girl friend. Even now within my imagination; and lately; suddenly its an Asian women that pops up in the middle of eyes to the far reaching eye….. So; its still an Asian women; its been that way for years…
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So; all Im suppose to do is get strong enough where I don’t need anyone but I just want them but I can take them or leave them. I can live . So I have allot of work to do; to get caught up and in time with the world as its moving forward…
So the work is simply; I just keep working on techniques that allow me to believe Im going to get what I want… That Im living in the End state of a desire; This means; writing stories and imagining Im already married to this Asian girlfriend… and I already have kids with her and house and car and money…
And their it is…
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God will let me know how to become the kind of man for this women and my goals…
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Lots of LOA coaches teach this kind of stuff; its based on different teachers through the ages… on this success thinking stuff….
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Oke
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What about Car.
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Well first; I have this Laws of attraction garden in my imagination; and I imagine I have a car plant. I imagine Im pouring water on Car plant seeds that are planted deep into the ground. I m pouring plant car food on the car plant and water… And God is the sunshine and its pouring down on the plant. I will cultivate them; take care of these plants and let them grow into cars I want.
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Same for the Wife. I have a Wife plant… in my imagination in a laws of attraction garden. And I pour water on it and wife plant food and grow it… and I imagine shes growing… and I will allow this over n over n over until I believe. And I will practice seeing her sprout out of the ground and slowly grow into a women..
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Heres the deal; I don’t have the friends I had when I was younger; because non of them were my real friends or at my frequency… They didn’t really know me or ever really want me around. They didn’t have my back. They were using me and then then will dump me and not care… This tells me I was never suppose to be around them in the first place. Today I work with God on Gods alignment..
I was at my own sensitive frequency; They were not at my frequency and I didn’t know it; Some how I walk into the hands of dangerous people; I did not see who they where; they were quite master manipulators… I never saw it; and they didn’t care either way because I meant nothing to them. I can see this now; and that is a miracle.
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However; its also a hard ship I must work with God on.
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However; there is a golden silver lining to the story; it also means I get way way way down on the totem pole at the bottom of the base and accept myself in that position and start over…
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My goals are like when a younger person wants to be a lawyer… they are still in high school or even junior high; they don’t really see how its possible or what to expect; so they stay the coarse and work at things; One thing is for sure; They really really really want it and are working toward that one thing…. To be a lawyer… They are resurrecting it; the dream.
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And Im doing the same with my goals. My goals are therapeutic to get me back inline with society and believing I can have the things I want in society; However; this time under Gods province state; Sovereign state; Ill be working for them… and God will be watching down on me and have plenty of people helping…
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Ill finally be on my own and developing the way I was suppose to in the beginning of my life… And Ill pray about all of it. And Ill be paying for it; it wont be free.
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We can also through in money; for a girlfriend. And of course for a car…
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So; God has the answers; I just have to shut my eyes; use my imagination and believe.
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As for car;
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I have to know what car. And My inner being knows what that is; So; lots of meditation and work on that subject… Unfortunately its in a place of mind rupturing. So I have to go in there to gather information; its like going into a burn victim trying to decipher what is going on.
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Ill get there… .
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In my imagination;
I am doing quit well; I feel it; Im back; like I was when I was a kid; but this time in my imagination; I'm grounded only to my fathers small apartment after the divorce and Ive got no close friend; well; I have a few but not the others. The ones I deamed important; like true finds; They are gone because they were never real in the first place.
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But it is happening the way I imagined; Im feeling my own sensitivity…
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Its all fantastic and great and the child level Im feeling in myself; is my authentic real self as if I had never met anyone when young; if instead I was alone working on my future when very young…
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I was born in the very early 1960’s So believe me; when I tell you all is very interesting… I get to start over literally… and I am from the very innocent base within me… So I am very lucky… God is my support. 12 step groups are my support when Im not being stalked…Like I am right now; and I have to do something about it; get a lawyer and or call the police; Getting close….
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I have to align with my higher power… and stay the course of my higher power; its my direction and there is no other direction.
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So; checking in on a few goals of interest Ill be working with God on…
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