I have to count backwards to figure out where I am in recovery. I believe it's 1 year and 10 months and some days. On March 4 I will be beginning my THIRD year of being gambling free!!

I COULD say I've got 2 years behind me, but saying 'beginning my THIRD' is just waaaaaay better.

But all joking aside, I'm more thrilled to be simply not gambling TODAY. That's enough.

I'm also secretly happy that I have to stop and count these days. The way I see it, that means I'm no longer enslaved - neither to the addiction OR to the recovery fears that we all go through. I'm no longer counting to inspire myself nor to see how long I can go before a slip. NOW, I'm just living life again, confident that with the proper attitude and determination I won't EVER slip and my attention is no longer focused on gambling (the doing or the quitting).

That's an amazing gift.

According to my budget, I will be out of debt completely this year. It seemed sooooo far away and impossible only 2 short years ago and yet here I am!

(Do me a favor. Reread that last sentence and then KNOW you can say the same thing - insert whatever time frame works for your situation and then BELIEVE you can be saying it too - sooner than you think.)

I won't lie. I've had some urges in the past year, but you know what? They were minuscule. They still really surprised me, because they literally came out of nowhere, but I concentrated on the surprise rather than the weak urge, and moved on easily.

I haven't re-read my blog posts for a long time, but maybe in the next few weeks, when I have some free time, I will travel back to the beginning of my recovery again. It's always strengthening to be reminded how strong the addiction was back then and how I progressed one day at a time to finally get here.

Here.

A place I love, where peace and contentment reign. A place where I feel safe and optimistic again. Yeah, 'here' is pretty damned fine. I really hoped it would be, back when I still called it 'there' and thought of it as impossible. I'm happy to report to any of you, who still call this place 'there', that it's real, it's possible, and it's YOURS for the taking.

Believe it. Believe you deserve it. Believe you can have it.

Because you DO, and by God you CAN. GUARANTEED.

I wish the best 2014 to all of you, and look forward to seeing you 'here' soon!

Today I will not gamble. Never again.