Unbelievably, I am celebrating 1 full year of not gambling today.

For the record, that means ALL gambling. No lottery tickets, no scratch and wins, no 'tokens only' websites, nothing.

And I think that turned out to be one of the main reasons I did so well, actually. I didn't feed the beast with appetizers. I starved it. If you're fortunate enough to get through the beginning, which I believe is the period filled with the most opportunities to fail, you find that by starving this particular beast, it gets easier fast.

I hope this post ends up inspiring someone, because God knows, we all need & deserve it. Let me tell you how good recovery gets. I don't feel the 'urge' to gamble (except in rare moments, which are very light AND few & far between) anymore. They used to be a 'normal' part of my day a year ago. They stopped being so big and so scary about 2 weeks into recovery and continued to diminish profoundly as time went by, save for an occassional blip which I would use to remind myself not to get complacent once it got easy.

I'm serious about this fact. My only thoughts about gambling these days are about anniversary dates. I don't think about gambling. I don't miss it. I don't crave it. I don't think about it, period. That said, I'm still not letting down my guard. No gambling is allowed in my life, period. I'm back to living, and I love it.

Other than a complete ban on gambling, I don't really think I have any secret weapon to share with you about quitting. It's really hard right at the beginning, but it gets easier very fast & continues to get exponentially easier with time. Remember though, that a slip puts you right back to day one. Nothing evil about a a person who slips, it can happen, but the 'easier' begins after 2 weeks, not directly after a slip. So each slip puts us back into the hardest part of recovery (that's one of the reasons this thing is so difficult to beat). If you can find a way to not slip, your chances of success improve dramatically.

But enough preaching. Today I'm celebrating an anniversary I've never had before. 1 year of being a recovering gambling addict.

OH MY GOD THAT FEELS GREAT TO WRITE! (Great to KNOW too! )

I'll tell you something else that's cool. Life. I can't believe how far from it that I was living, when I was in the throws of this addiction. It isolates us. I'm always amazed at those Casino commercials showing everyone celebrating together at a slot machine. What crap. Gambling was, without a doubt, the least social thing I've ever done. That's kind of symbolic, actually, because every lie about gambling that exists, I used as an excuse to gamble. Whichever lie worked that day, I went with. But the simple truth was that I WANTED to gamble. I WANTED to feel the rush. I WANTED to disappear into the addiction because I believed it felt good. The great news is, now I WANT to live as a non-gambler... and I am! And I HAVE for 1 year!

Once I got real about WHY I gambled, it became harder to slip. Maybe that's a good tip for some of us, too. Get real about yourself and remember that you're allowed to be human. Sometimes we're not perfect. Needless to say, I'm grateful for getting real about me. As is - warts and all. I'm incredibly grateful for my 1 year anniversary milestone. And above all, I'm grateful for today.

Speaking of which... Today I will not gamble. Never again

Congratulations! One full year of non-gambling is no mean feat. I really appreciate all you've blogged about over the time. And I wish you all the best for many more of these anniversaries to come.

Thank you Ada. Much appreciated. I'm already looking forward to saying (tomorrow) I'm in my SECOND year! LOL.

And thanks for all your kind words during the year, I appreciated them all.

Congratulations!! Your strength and wisdom is an inspiration to me, I always come to this site hoping to find a new entry from you

Wow. Thank you Zen66, that was an amazing thing to read & I really appreciate it. I always think it about other posts here, but it's nice to know my story is helpful too.

You made my day!