Well, I had a rough couple of weeks at the start of 2013, but I'm doing great again.

2 points;

1) I have not gambled. At all.

2) 'Rough' is a matter of perspective. The first couple of weeks I had unexpected gambling thoughts. They lasted about 2 minutes and definitely fall into the 'urge' category. The first couple of weeks of my quitting gambling, the urges were constant and it was the breaks in between that lasted about 2 minutes, so I'll take 2013 over 2012 any day.

I am so stoked to think that I'm coming up to my 12th month. I am also extremely glad I had a rough couple of weeks so recently. It's like an innoculation. I'm geared up for any possible 'milestone' urges that should hit next month or right after my 1 year mark. Yes. I'm cocky enough to discuss it as a given now, that I WILL hit my 1 year mark. My 'don't jinx things!' days are behind me. Superstition belongs with the addiction, not with the recovery.

I don't think luck has anything to do with recovery. It's hard work, it's constant vigilance and it's sincere commitment. Luck is a fantasy. Good fortune isn't. It was good fortune that I haven't (and never will, I hope) stumbled on this latest, greatest path. Here are the ingredients I think you need to succeed in recovery:

1) Good timing.

I truly believe we need a proper period of time where we can endure the first part of quitting. It's not easy, and getting knocked off track is very possible, so the right time for you matters. Just don't use that as an excuse to gamble - "Bad timing, so I'll try again later." - not cool, my friend, not cool.


2) Consistency in your thinking.

You have to be on board as your own coach and at your weakest moment, find the strength to remind yourself why you originally KNEW you had to do this.


3) Hope.

It's essential. If you allow yourself to feel the effort is hopeless, it will be. YOU are worth hope. YOU are deserving of hope. And most importantly YOU control hope. It's free and you're capable, keep it going.


4) Honesty.

Every stumble's excuse begins with your desire to gamble. Nothing short of a gun to your head counts as 'forcing' you to gamble. The excuses may be valid when you're unhappy about stumbling, but they couldn't have worked, if you hadn't somehow wanted to give in to them. I know that's a harsh truth, (and it doesn't make you a bad person), but acknowledging that fact is such an important part of your road to recovery. Plain and simple. You don't need to lie to yourself about why you gambled, you need to remove the reasons why it's hard to quit, to the very best of your ability.


5) Determination about the direction you want to go.

It's not easy to keep trying & stumbling, and if you stop stumbling, recovery still comes in stages that require changes in your plans & behavior. You need to be determined about your path. If THAT is consistent, your chances of success improve dramatically.


6) Faith in your worth.

You matter. Not just to yourself, but to your friends and family. If it gets hard, remember not just WHY you're doing this, but for WHOM, too. Include yourself in that list everytime. God knows you're worth it, your family knows you're worth it & your friends know you're worth it. Now YOU just have to know it too.

7) Forgetting the joy of gambling.

It died a long time ago. That's why you are struggling to quit. No one tries to quit something good. On some level you KNOW it can never, never, never come back. Not even if you continue to gamble. In fact, it only gets darker if you continue to gamble. Let it go. It's a fantasy.


Look to those who have succeeded.

Proof is powerful stuff. There's proof all around for everything. Stop looking at proof that you can make money gambling (no matter how astronomically rare it is, we ALL hang on to that one story about some 'win') and start looking at proof that you can walk away from it. You can. You will.

NOTE: The characters for the 8th point make a smiley face. I was going to change it, but decided I like ending my list with a smile! This list is not definitive, nor is it even that fully thought out, just ideas off the top of my head. If they don't make sense to you, make a list that DOES. It's about your success, not someone else's ideas. Take what you need and leave the rest. And all my wishes for your best successes to come.

I'm enjoying my life again, something that seemed impossible this time, last year, so I can tell you what seems impossible is possible. Getting your life back is POSSIBLE! Don't give up. Not on your path, not on your ability to do it, and above all else, not on YOURSELF. I didn't, and it's the greatest choice I've made to date. I'm going to make it again, too.

Today I will not gamble. Never again.