God I feel good.

I'm coming up to 1 year and 9 months free from gambling. 100% free. It's an amazing feeling. I've been so busy with work and family & friends that I really haven't thought about it much, but tonight I'm sitting at home, enjoying some down time and I thought I should write a little in the blog.

In fact, except for listing it for the record in this blog, I honestly didn't know how long I've been clean. Over a year and a half is good enough for me, but I wanted to be accurate for here.

In recovery (at least for me) you start to realize that it's not the count but the consistency. I don't care how many days or weeks or months or years I'm clean. I just care that I'm STILL clean. And now that I have some substantial time behind me, it's been a very calm and easy road.

That doesn't mean I haven't had 'thoughts' - I have. But they're weightless now and have almost no power over me anymore. As long as I'm consistent in saying 'no', it's power is gone. As long as I'm consistent in saying 'no'. I CAN'T stress that to myself enough.

Anyway, for now, I'm strong and clean. It's the greatest feeling. I can see my debt disappearing and should be debt free this time next year! I've halved it so far and it just keeps going down!

No wise words, just some commentary on where I am and how I feel. I hope it's inspiration for anyone out there who needs it. Freedom from addiction is FANTASTIC! And it belongs to anyone who reaches for it. Good luck to all in the fight.

Today I will not gamble. Never again.