i want to op out of the transgender thing. infact i want to opt out of life. i looked today on a transgender site and whereas some are very passable there are the others that are a man in a dress which ever way you look at them. people may ignore it but there is no way they look female. i dont want to be like that it was one of the main reasons i was opting out of life before. the bipolar and mental state ruined my life and i was grabbing at any chance to belive i could change. my mind jumps allover the place. i can no longer work out whats real and whats fantasy,im warping things to the point its real.i get days when i think im back normal and sensible but then i think its just a false me wanting to go back to being hyper. i try to stop myself and stay with it but i dont know if that is a false side. when im venting like this in the back of my mind is a voice saying to hell with it go out with a bang and if i did i wouldnt care about anyone.