i was trying to get a bit of knowlage about what the so called consultant says i have but i cant absorb info very well these days. one thing i saw was this and it hit a nerve
People with BPD are considered to be among the most challenging groups of patients to work with in therapy, requiring a high level of skill and training in the psychiatrists, therapists and nurses involved in their treatment.[171] A majority of psychiatric staff report finding individuals with BPD moderately to extremely difficult to work with and more difficult than other client groups.
it just explained why our mh service just drop u and leave u to fend alone. tthey dont want to know its too much trouble for them they pick and choose the easy patients so they can have a good succsess level to keep their funding.i tried my best to stay with them but they just wait for one bad reaction and make excuses and dump u. i dont like doctors never have and the mh so called doctors i wont listen to anymore. ive seen various docs over the years some officially some as a favour or unofficial and they all have a different story. im my early days i used to see a doc unofficially and he said ur mixed and hard to understand u definatly need something doing. 2004 i saw a doc after an incident and his prognosis from the reports hed had was suspected psychosis prob transiant,bi polar or similar dissorder and something else he didnt like. then he couldnt act because of the situation at the time and i was supposed to go seek help from mh but i never did.now ive herd so much i disbelive most of it. they change the rules to suit themselfs. ive always ignored the docs when theyve seen me and i know i was right as the first time i listened and tried to go along with them they stiched me up,played games and dumped me. they played games with the wrong person i wont forget them for that. now i just muddle through myself. my gp was supposed to be getting me in with some forensic team who done a lot with bpd and i could go as id been introuble with the police but it all seems to be bollocks and blocked by the mh place i was under. they still play games,carry on it will bite u in the end.anyway it seems to have come to nothing with no real explination.i was conned by them thats what i get for trusting them. i wont ever go near another psyc doc as long as i live. i did better without them and now i dont consider they have any skill they just guess.untill i got involved with them id avoided the police and everyone,since they came on the scene my life fell apart. now i have to get through everyday and try somehow to get back to how i was putting them and the rest out of my mind. i proved that consultant to be a liar and his department making up the rules to suit themselfs when i first went there but what can u do they are almighty doctors and beyound question. actually it amuses me that the consultant forgot the first time i met him a couple years before. id had some sort of episode,god knows wat,and i endedup seeing him as an urgent case so he fitted me in at the end of his day. hed been given a story of what id been doing and half way throught the consultation was writing a prescription. he told me to get the meds asap and he would ring me. so i went home and the chemist was shut so i thought id get them in the morning. he rang soon after saying hed been thinking about it and i may have to go in the next day as there were legal and mental worries so could i be ready to go in. i said ok then an hour or so later googled the stuff hed put on the prescription. they were antipsychotics and a big dose. at that point i tore up the script and thought i aint taking them. i didnt go back in the following day and when they rang i told them where to go. that was it they dumped me. went from ur psychotic and we are concerned theres legal stuff gone on and ur not well to not our problem in a day.mental health is fun u make the rules up as u go along. never went back till 4 years later. i didnt say anything at first then i dropped it into the conversation so they went to look. after a while they said oh we lost your records when we moved we have no records of that it seems incorrect. i said thats exactly how it happened and the consultant knows it u were too busy to be bothered. they just wouldnt talk about it. the consultant knew,he remembered but he didnt say anything. i caught him out and he didnt like it,i caught him lieing after that and he stiched me up to get even. hes an almighty consultant who can question him? i dont know what happens to me and now i dont care.i know our mh system is bad for u. i wont go near it ever again. they want to section me then take me to prison i wont go to a ward again and ill battle like theyve never seen if they try. i want to come off these mood stabilisers now ive been on them too long and i dont need them. i did better on my own life was sweet.now they have everyone watching me so i just keep away from people.tell no one anything and trust no one. watch everyone as if they are going to hurt u and dont let them. im all alone and better that way. no one to stich me up,noone to know anything.smile be nice and show them no feelings.i dont like people i dont want to be sociable or agrree with muppet doctors. leave me alone dont try to work me out ill ###$ ur head