Such a hankering for carb laden food.

~2 hours after getting tired during a viewing of a wooden and predictable "Beverly Hills Chihuahua movie I decided to take a nap,something I rarely like or feel compelled to do.Maybe it's b/c I unwittingly went till 3 .a.m. to finally finish up the psych book I have and move on to a graphic novel I've been curious about.

-I wake up at like 5:30 pm (with my mom still watching of the movies in the series -_- ) and get this fiercesome hankering for food.Not just anything though.Something that'll get rid of the "sweet" flavor from my mouth.It's pretty f----g bizzare .I do eat fruit on a consist basis but for some reason after only some guayava juice at 5 .a.m. after having woken up b/c of the smashing around while flying of a poor budgie and a pear and orange around 12-ish before we went to to see my uncle's new daughter,born the day before my mouth feels like it's been eating bags of candy or something.

I then go on a feeding frenzy eating like ~9 pergories,2 tall glasses of oats with water (something we've done in our family since we were little),halves of pieces of tenderized steak that my mom made in the afternoon without the usual heat up I'd do to it to get rid of oil,peanuts,some blueberry yogurt & 2 whole untoasted naan breads.

Just ~2 minutes from whence I wrote this I had 3 big tablespoons of peanut butter which finally seemed to do the trick in getting rid of the sacharinne flavor from my mouth maybe b/c of the dry,sticky,"spready-ness" of peanut butter.

We were about to go to a sushi buffet for my brother's birthday today but I called prior.I don't have a good memory of that place (Sapporo) as when I visited there last year in August for my b-day (while I admit to have been in gym clothes of a unfanciful shirt and shorts sort) ,a few ppl were glancing at me and a server/waitress approached me with a (imo) haughty look in her eyes when I asked her about how the birthday special works and I soon left having understood better. When I called I was told that for the birthday person to eat for free they have to be accompanied by *at least* 4 other ppl.At $20 a person that's not a good deal to me,it sounds -_- .

That would've been one of the few times I eat somewhere else that's "fancy".The closest I think I've ever gone to "fancy" is a "Mandarin Restaurant" (an all you can eat buffet Chinese restaurant franchise) and Swiss Chalet which according about less than thrice to sit in and eat when I was little.According to wikipedia Swiss Chalet is only "casual dining",though I can say from experience that it's atmosphere is a lot like how El Salvador tries to make Pizza Hut's come off as.Both Swiss Chalet and "Mandarins" are Canadian franchises by the way.

I swear there has to be be some additive put into plain old Kellogs corn flakes and rice crispies as there are parts of my tongue and my head that I can feel "flare up" with a desire for more eting after eating those cereals.Maybe I feel that b/c of my Asperger's I don't know even though a bit more speculation might be possible from me after having read the psych chapters on sensation,perception and a bit of neurosci.

I gotta get my rear out of here soon.

My enviro teacher sent a msg out saying that,the ecofootprint assignment's grade weight got changed from 10 to 5% which he said is good for ppl who didn't do it (like me).

I go to a staff office,he coincidentally enters soon after me and I ask him with a picture of the screen printed off what this means and where the heck the assignment is b/c I never found it in the table of contents.He said under the "foundations" category like others b4,but I tell him I still haven't seen that in spite of ppl saying that.

Key help answer?:he tells me I gotta get a 9/10 on the online quiz about the web pagethere to unlock the rest of the class contents.He gives me a freeby answer saying that the amount of drop entries is 1 and that and my responses gave me the boost to 9/10,different from my previously highest answer of 8.

For the past over 1.5 hours though I've been floundering around tvtropes after having printed a few pages =~= .

I could think of two braggart dingbats that I could look up on facebook who for some f---g reason "succeded" yet in predicatable a-- likelihood have the same cocky attitudes as before ^1 .

But why?.

I left the same premises as those duckers like ~5 yrs ago and I wanna embitter myself like that?.My expression methods may have changed but for a large part I'm still incredibly negative as before.And TO H---- with the previously used models of always seeing if the reflections of what I'm doing now match up to what I was doing and how I was 5 or 10 years ago.B/c if I do that then the c----ness would go on till I'm at least 27 and seeing how matched up to when I was 17 and 22 (-->now).

My race and ethnic dynamics teacher actually said that you learn more as an adult^2 .When I asked why I think she said "more experiences..and it helps if you pop out a kid".

Hacing wondered around the course listings for philosophy at MacMaster http://registrar.mcmaster.ca/calendar/2013-14/pg1832.html

I can say f---k the ridicule humanities ppl get b/c the courses their are comparable to courses in other programs.Of particular notice to me are those logic classes..coupled up with the minor in math that they offer with it and would've seemed like a nice lil'fantasy to have taken such a program.Two intellectual stimulants;one a sedative (philosophy),the other a spark plug that really makes your mind run and it's something most ppl are to "scared" of unfortunately/with much pity+sympathy to them for feeling that way (math)

http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/AcceptableLifestyleTargets

"Everyone in the "social sciences" will be considered intellectual lightweights, but English majors seem to get hit pretty hard. Certain such majors also tend to be dismissed as "trendy victim studies."

Philosophy students, which is kinda funny when you consider philosophy includes logic and ethics. They are basically getting a degree in winning arguments and making other people feel stupid and/or morally wrong.

Math majors are both soulless number-crunchers and have no marketable skills. This is a belief which is quite bizarre, since advanced mathematics is a highly marketable skill and requires creative thinking. For a while before math majors became common physics majors were making a killing in the financial sector because they were the only ones available with the requisite skills, after all actual physics jobs were scarce and didn't pay nearly as well. This belief seems to be attributable to the fact that most writers (and most people) don't understand what mathematicians do and assume it is something esoteric and useless when the reality is far different. For example, in the United States, the biggest hirer of mathematicians is the National Security Agency."

"Marketability" be danged my friends!.I'd do it for the love and "bliss of the 'mind kiss' " of being intimate with philosophy and math for a years .

^1 Honestly ppl in their early 20's don't really seem deserving of being called "adults"..it's more like "teenagehood:part 3,hopefully this is it,the last phase b/c if continues past your late 20's now it's weird".

^2 F-----------------------------K YYYYEEEEEEAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH ! .Someone ACTUALLY admitted that!.And a "respectable" professional no less.It's like kicking the face of like (what?) 10,000+ years of conventional sociopsychological upper lip,high and mighty attitude saying that once you are an adult things are constant and everything must remain the same.

-------------------------

When ppl tease each saying "you were clingy to your parents when...

[ Continued ]

This might seem like a stupid complaint but something seems wrong.I love how we so much information at our finger tips with the internet.More than anyone could ever use and in a way different than the stuff in a story about a book with infinite pages^1 .I mean I've rounded up ebooks and nice lil'articles at times to one of my skydrive accounts which I might very well not ever read and appreciate..

I can't help but think these things:am I spoiled?^2

and it's really messed up that the internet as we know it today which I guess you can say started when HTML 1.0 was invented ('93?) after previous decades as a military and academic institution only network is the "surface web" of 19 terabytes worth of whats indexed and catalogued in contrast to the 7500 terabytes of the "deep web" where it's of significant note that disturbing illegal stuff goes on there.In less than a quarter centuries hundreds more terabytes of who knows what but those who access it like hackers,accumulated.

All those server farms,how many jobs can potentially be replaced were we to get past complications of program and hardware.b/c d--- I think my history teacher saying how ubiquitous computers are in our like being a bad thing is getting to me ^3..how much energy do those server farms use up?.Is it all that sustainable even with the virtual nature of this stuff?.Can we afford to do some radical restructuring or will big corps like Google and Microsoft not let us?.

Meh,I guess the "deep web" get disclosed more as search engines improve.All that info though..it's one reason I've lately felt to find out about the bare and "raw" form of knowledge with epsitemology,reasoning and logic.

Ok now to shut the h--- up and think of what homework I have

-Survey on green footprint:-_- still can't find it in spite of VERY little webpages to naviagate thru 4 the class

-Watch socio videos

-Watch psych videos maybe

-Read psych notes for the test that's maybe tomorrow -_-

-Do race and ethnic dynamics questions on video of Natives + ask Miss *when* percisely is it that the opinion of person (who's assumed to not be a social sci expert's) opinion on an ethnicity is racist,again b/c you weren't really paying much attention the first time and the livescribe pen wasn't recording

--Do race and ethnic dynamics questions on video of Japanese Canadian WWII camps (assignment) due the 5th and needing annoying APA formatting and bibliography stuff

-Set up tracklist for story you picked for english (a sound of thunder) with 4-5 songs

-Do Myers-Brigg assignment for group dynamics (Feb 4th)

-Actually read Dracula some more

-Print out loads of slideshows for the classes with 6x2 slides,double sided powerpoint print outs doing the trick ussually

-The enviromental survey assignment which you gotta do in a group -_-

-Assignment where you do psych type tests with little kid/cousin (due Valentines)

the 2nd psych asg has 3 choices I think:violence in kid's shows,a moral dilemma and the stages of prep when someone is dying and the grieving.I'd like to try the 2nd one.

See xod_s?.Nothing hard.Just long,needing time and fun.That's all.

^1 Yesterday night I finished an assignment for the short story "the book of sand" by Jorge Luis Broges who I've heard of.An Hispanic writer who's stuff has influenced Christopher Nolan at least for one movie,Inception.

^2 B/c having more info and articles than I could ever use at my finger tips in a non-physical forms seems...too decadent.. like bathing in liquids meant for consumption like chocolate or hard liquor.The former which I really don't like eating and the latter which I don't at all

^3 Seems a bit "predictable/expected" that a history teacher would be weary of tech ...

[ Continued ]

Notes from my sister to help me ^1

What [xod_s] wants to change about himself: What [xod_s] can do to change these things:
Learn to drive Mom can teach him, study again for G1, ask questions when someone else is driving about the rules
Lack of work experience Volunteer!!! Research autism support groups- MAKE THE TIME ( gym is not a priority),
Initiate or continue conversation
Voice- output is nothing like what you hear
Distracted easily
Lack of being called “excited, having a life”
Facial expressions:
Self Worth:
Negativity

What [xod_s] likes about himself:
• Height
• Cardio
• Knowledge


^1 In spite of being a lazy dingbat that I am who's struggling to do some of the easiest homework like ever given I was actually able to work a chat with my sister where she arguably gave me psych tips