I'm at odds about graduation. Am I supposed to be an adult now? Should I be happy? What do I do when I go up on the stage to get my diploma?

Should I shake the deans hand and smile while looking at the audience knowing that no one came there to take a photo of me or cheer me on?

Should I even go? I'm thinking I shouldn't... Just grab my diploma and dip, smoke a cigarette or go to a bar while everyone laughs with their friends and family. It sound so much better than suffering through one more of these graduations.