I miss Miss Bliss. I miss being creative and full of ideas I put into action and creative loving gifts for my friends family and myself. I miss my sewing machine. I miss intuitively knowing what to do to make a new pattern for shorts or a new quilting block. I miss color. I miss me.
I cannot create when I am depressed. I am holy depressed. I cannot get over seeing my husband act 100% out of character and give another woman what he told me he is incapable of giving me. I am not special enough>?< I gave up trying to get physical attention because of all the rejection. I let things go to the point the kisses on the calendar and blown in the air was all there was for me. I need kisses, hugs and to be touched and loved on. I need positive words of encouragement..I need daily hugs. I need SMILE FOR ME & THINKING OF YOU ALWAYS but that is for someone else and I cannot handle these facts. I cannot handle the e3motional attachment my husband made with another woman while blowing me off. I can't..I shake day and night and I anxious and questioning every time I am sent out for ice cream that he is sending me out so he can message her. I wish I didn't think that but its not like he is opening up and telling me he indeed ended it as he said..even though he was doing nothing WRONG