How are you today thread (trigger warning)

We just have overwhelming sadness today. Zed is feeling very sad, we hope she feels better soon.
Today has just been unproductive making us feel guilty but tommorow is a new day

seems like a lot of people are having troubles lately, from looking at this thread.

We've been overwhelmed as well today.

First, badly dissociated... derealization,depersonalization. knowing lots of names but not which one is the right one this morning. Everything around us looked either desaturated, flat, dull cardboard, or anything bright was churning and moving, like water in the wake of a big boat. Getting bad dizzy spells, and probing headaches that strike in a different part of the head ever few minutes.

Put on V2's music to see if that would make us feel better. It made V2 feel better but she wasn't 'us'. (Or we weren't her?) ... she was happy but somewherein the back of our head, not up front. Our body felt wrong, like it didn't fit right. Too tight, too loose, too big, too small. Just wrong.

Went out to excercise to try and feel more grounded and got overwhelmed with terror and fear, of a small helpless child. Arin, we think. Asked Melissa to take care of her.

Then we started hallucinating. Nothing terrible or scary, just troubling. Large dark shapes that ducked behind trees when we looked at them. We knew they weren't real, but it's still perplexing.

Back home now and juist back to feeling dissociated again. Numb, dull, lost, empty. The only really good thing is the knowledge that sometime, in the next few hours, or couple days at most, all this will be completely forgotten. Just some notes on the forum and in our journal, that we'll look at and think to ourselves, "Huh, that sounds like it sucked."

Feels quiet on the forum today. I hope everybody's doing ok.

And that's another big experience, VioletFlux, hope things calmed down.

Fireheart, good luck, Thursday!

My way too long e-mails to possible T's to be are getting longer after each failed attempt with a T. Today I wrote a T relevant stuff, I hope, for a decision. And I really hope this will go through (he was recommended by the company who does administration/insurance/etc for independent T's) because A) male, B) not far away C) teammembers with the really nice shrink who did the intake at the other place where I was diagnosed and D) we share a same big interest. Fingers crossed.

hurricanes over. I'm good. tired, but I do think my vitamin b shots are helping.

offer on another house was accepted. **fingers crossed**

trying not to mutter to myself in the hallway at work...failing. buying a house is a huge decision and hard to agree on things when you're sharing headspace.

kid is 110%amazing and happy. painted herself up like an Amazon and danced around all hurricane. fuq it. I let her. it was washable face paint.

hope I sleep well tonight. feeling exhausted. part inside still has strong feelings for dude we met and barely know. sigh, fuq, why.....

and a million bonus points for me still keeping my $#%^ together. almost 5 years since my breakdown. hu-fuqin'-zah!!!!

Glad you're all ok through the storm BeccaBee. And congrats, you earned those million bonus points!

Bejer, I hope things work out with this new T. It sounds like a really good fit.

We just had another 'coming to' moment... That feeling when you blink and wonder, where am I, what am I doing, how did I get here, where did the time go?

They're usually rare for us, and we've had like... 3 or 4 today, that I can remember.

Gonna just call it a day and go to bed. Maybe tomorrow will be more stable.

T responded; seeing him next week. HAPPY

Bejer wrote:T responded; seeing him next week. HAPPY

Yay! Congrats!

VioletFlux wrote:

Bejer wrote:T responded; seeing him next week. HAPPY

Yay! Congrats!

Thank you, VioletFlux!!

Congratulations I hope things go well this time

NyxX wrote:Congratulations I hope things go well this time

Thank you, NyxX!!