Does it bother you to think about sex

I find I can think about it if it involves 2D characters in manga or anime, usually of the yaoi genre, but the moment it strays to humans, male-female or male-male, I don't want to think about it anymore. It's not something I necessarily want to change, but I wouldn't mind getting to the root of this reaction. It feels very adolescent'ish.

It doesn't, because I have Internet access. I have romantic/sexual feelings for one person, but thanks to the Internet, I don't feel like I have to do something about them. It's far better that I don't anyway, since this person is married and also my manager. But then, I never did seem to get as aroused as my peers who would go ballistic over seeing a girl in yoga pants or whatever.

Darwinschild wrote:but the moment it strays to humans, male-female or male-male, I don't want to think about it anymore

I'm not sure if it's implied here that "female-female is no problem". Is it?

Sometimes it gets me kinda angry that some people seem to have "easy access" to sex without effort, commitment, bond, consequence, or specific "merit" of any kind. They just want it > mysterious magic > voilà, they have it > go on with their day. I don't understand how it even works, and bugs me because I wish I could have the same, and I know I most likely never will.

But I don't wish I didn't have a sex drive either, because without it I would probably be like a zombie that doesn't even want to eat brainz. Nowadays this sort-of anger doesn't last long when it happens (I'm actually not sure if this is a good thing or not). I'm more concerned with being able to enjoy my private private-time. Total inability to enjoy it is a bad sign (although not as bad as inability to enjoy music, which does happen sometimes).

Placid wrote:It's far better that I don't anyway, since this person is married and also my manager.

Dodged a few bullets there!

anagram wrote:

Darwinschild wrote:but the moment it strays to humans, male-female or male-male, I don't want to think about it anymore

I'm not sure if it's implied here that "female-female is no problem". Is it?

I find that as a heterosexual female, if I am going to think about sex, it will more likely involve male-female or male-male, than female-female.

My impression is that men are also less likely to think about male-male, than they are female-female or female-male.

But in general, I don't like thinking about sex if humans are involved. 2D yaoi characters, I have no problems with.

Darwinschild wrote:as a heterosexual female

Okay, it's clearer now. If you were male or otherwise attracted to women, then the thought of "female-female sex" would probably be more relevant than M-F (or M-M, naturally).

i'm pretty grossed out when it comes to sex, so i guess you could say it bothers me some.

No, it doesn't usually bother me to think about sex if it's just my own thoughts and not caused by someone who is harassing me in one way or another, or some news about child sexual abuse and so on. I'm not saying that child sexual abuse shouldn't be on the news, it's just that it makes me feel bad for the children. Seeing sexual images while browsing the tumblr for example doesn't bother me to a certain limit. When it gets too graphic it gets icky.

When I was about 18/19 years of age and thought about a possible sexual encounter, a wave of fear/dread would go through my body.

Mind you, at that age I was a virgin and obviously had no idea what sex was all about. I'm am almost 40 now and still don't.

I rarely think about it now, but when I do, I just resign myself to the fact that it only happens to "other people"

As "anagram" said, it kind of bothers me that it just seems to happen naturally to most people, but as I get older now, I feel more at ease with the fact that I don't want sex & my family name genetic line will be ending with me.

anagram wrote:But I don't wish I didn't have a sex drive either, because without it I would probably be like a zombie that doesn't even want to eat brainz. .

I disagree, in my experience it is the opposite. When my sex drive peaks my mind becomes a lot more clouded and I can't think as clearly. Many of my friends who have "normal levels" of sex drive become more zombie-esque, relentlessly chasing after sex as if it is the only thing that matters. I'd say a lack of a sex drive would not mean you would become a zombie, it would actually clear your mind and allow you to make decisions without being confounded by biological effects.

Vreedzame wrote:it would actually clear your mind and allow you to make decisions without being confounded by biological effects.

The thing is, it's not about decisions. There's no point in making any kind of decision if there's no expected outcome. It's about motivation. Without the most primitive motivations, I run the risk of having none. And that is never good.