PEOPLE THAT HAVE BPD OK!

I'M SICK OF BEING REFFERD TO AS A BORDERLINE PERSON. I AM NOT THE F*CKING DEFINITION OF BORDERLINE. IM STILL A HUMAN BEING I JUST HAVE A DISORDER. I WILL TAKE OFFENCE TO PEOPLE REFERRING TO US AS "BPD GF/BF AND BORDERLINE GF/BF" OK

LEAVE ME ALONE!

im just gonna leave this forums cant do anything right bye

I guess I'll take these posts in reverse order.

Lia I'm sorry that you chose to leave. I have always enjoyed your interactions with me. I hope you will decide to come back.

As for the whole BPD <relationship term> vs <realtionship term> with BPD, I know that it can be demeaning to feel that you are being reduced to your "disorder". However, I have seen posters with a BPD dx refer to themselves as "BPDs", so I feel a little confused and put-off when referring to people as they refer to themselves provokes anger. (I know that there are some really good examples of this in society at large, but I don't completely understand the arguments for the differentiation in the terminology.)

Your post didn't make a whole lot of sense to me but I hope you feel better soon.

Lia if youre offended, its pretty simple, dont read the posts from the nons and dont make useless unhelpful comments on them ..

you reply for the sake of replying.. do you really think its helpful for the original poster to only get comments like "i cant help you", and its not an "im sorry I cant help you but I wish I could" its a "Youre a d!ck because youre a non and I hate you because you referred to your partner has borderline and not my partner with BPD"

if you cant help someone DONT REPLY, if you are going to reply MAKE IT CONSTRUCTIVE

I'll say it again as I did in response to your post you deleted, i refer to myself as borderline, AS DO MANY OTHERS, I refer to myself in front of my partners as borderline, therefore if one of my partners had come on here to seek help about me i would EXPECT them to NATURALLY say my borderline girlfriend.. thats what I am and will be until I dont meet the criteria anymore, Im a borderline, my actions are borderline, my personality is predominantly borderline... its not always a bad thing and you dont always have to look at it as a disorder..

as for the people that are posting "my bpd gf/bf" ITS NOT DIRECTED AT YOU, they are NOT targeting you, THEY ARE NOT REFERRING TO YOU AS A BORDERLINE, they are talking about their partners, stop making everything about you, youre not entitled to speak for everyone and assume everyone will be offended

I get what your saying Lia. But this kinda thing is done in the English language all the time... We say things like ... white person, black person, crazy person, mentally ill person, smart person, and etc. Its just a way to identify the person your thinking of. Saying "white person" doesn't totally define that person. They are much more than just white, but it helps one understand who is being referenced or points out a particular characteristic in question.

Its probably grammatically incorrect to say "borderline person" without better qualifying the meaning with "personality disorder" since the term borderline doesn't correctly describe the disorder but the shortcut seems natural as an easy adjective.

bsl9408 wrote:Lia if youre offended, its pretty simple, dont read the posts from the nons and dont make useless unhelpful comments on them ..

you reply for the sake of replying.. do you really think its helpful for the original poster to only get comments like "i cant help you", and its not an "im sorry I cant help you but I wish I could" its a "Youre a d!ck because youre a non and I hate you because you referred to your partner has borderline and not my partner with BPD"

if you cant help someone DONT REPLY, if you are going to reply MAKE IT CONSTRUCTIVE

I'll say it again as I did in response to your post you deleted, i refer to myself as borderline, AS DO MANY OTHERS, I refer to myself in front of my partners as borderline, therefore if one of my partners had come on here to seek help about me i would EXPECT them to NATURALLY say my borderline girlfriend.. thats what I am and will be until I dont meet the criteria anymore, Im a borderline, my actions are borderline, my personality is predominantly borderline... its not always a bad thing and you dont always have to look at it as a disorder..

as for the people that are posting "my bpd gf/bf" ITS NOT DIRECTED AT YOU, they are NOT targeting you, THEY ARE NOT REFERRING TO YOU AS A BORDERLINE, they are talking about their partners, stop making everything about you, youre not entitled to speak for everyone and assume everyone will be offended

I must say I agree with this. Every word of it.

I think Lia is referring to the post by JohnnyBlaze in this thread:
borderline-personality/topic80458.html
where he calls out Lia even though she did not post in the thread.

I don't think the issue is just what term to use...it's also about relating to each other directly.

I was going to let this recent rash of "we're not BPD; we're people who have BPD" thing slide, but I think it's gotten a little out of hand, so here I am. Plus, you caught me on a "take no sh*t" day.

borderline-personality/topic80458.html

Lia_Interrupted wrote:

JohnnyBlaze wrote:From what I know, a lot of BPD's go through this (sorry, Lia - a lot of people who have BPD)

I never even posted here. Don't be a bully. I'm reporting this to Mods.

Well, you did post here, so I get to respond.

It was a simple smarta$$ comment in reference to all of the condescension you've been exhibiting lately. If I wanted to bully, I'd have come at you a lot harder, more like I am now.

Have you looked back through your posts? YOU have referred to us as "BPD's". Talk about the pot and the f***ing kettle! You even said in you first post here "...as I'm a BPD." It was only a month ago; it wasn't that long. So how did you go from calling yourself a BPD to being absolutely incensed when someone else says it in just four weeks? Even ignoring your early posts, as recently as LAST WEEK, you referred to us as "Borderlines" (link), not "people with Borderline Personality Disorder". You might want to check yourself before you start pointing fingers at the rest of us.

One thing that you need to remember: when people say "BPD" or "non" or any other classification like that, it's not personal, it's economical. It's a lot easier to say or type "my BPD boy/girlfriend" than saying "my boy/girlfriend who is suffering from the symptoms of and/or has been diagnosed as having Borderline Personality Disorder". Practicality rules in many aspects, including the written language.

Like BSL and others, I refer to myself as BPD. It's a part of me; just as much as any other part, and probably more than most. Our biggest identifiers, our names, probably have the least to do with us of anything. BPD affects how you feel and how you think. Your name just affects what sound you respond to. So why is one acceptable and the other isn't?

By all means, report my quoted post to the mods. You're certainly free to do so. But given the way you've been lately, I think that shot across the bow was warranted. If it made you sit up and take notice that not everyone agrees with you and, later on (due to this post) that even you are doing what you're protesting against, then the posts were worth it.

I don't want you to leave, but I'm not about to tuck my tail between my legs and say "you're right, I'm wrong" just to keep you here. My recommendation, if you're not happy here, is to take a break. A lot of us have done it; myself included. Someone said something incredibly offensive to me that made me absolutely detest them. Rather than go to war over something that had no goal worth achieving, I left the site for a bit. After a while, I came back; I still have nothing to do with, and hold no respect for that person (yes, they're still here, although they post less frequently now). I expect that, after this post, if you do take my advice, you'll probably categorize me the same way and not talk to me. Other than this one matter, I have nothing against you, but it's entirely up to you, and I certainly wouldn't fault you for it.

As I say, it's your call.

EDIT: in retrospect, you're right. The quoted post was uncalled for, and for that I do apologize.

Wow, feel like I stepped into the sh!tstorm.

Well, I am a person WITH BPD, but I would also tend to refer to myself as "a BPD".

BUT - I can say, in some tinge of defense, that when I read about "borderlines", it does make me angry, because I don't feel that I DEFINE BPD, nor DOES IT DEFINE ME.

So, people, can we all agree, that as a collective whole, we ARE BPD'ers, but that we do NOT DEFINE BPD?

LOL... let's just all get along, people. We're self-destructing as a group.

<3

AMP