Another silly poll

I'm definitely the Impulsive type and nothing else. If it has histrionic and antisocial features but they are being caused by BPD, that seems logical given my psychological make up.

ajrocker8 wrote:I'm definitely the Impulsive type and nothing else. If it has histrionic and antisocial features but they are being caused by BPD, that seems logical given my psychological make up.

My sweet sadistic soul mate

Lol awww Alice! That's so sweet of you!

I'm subclinical borderine, but anyway, let's see which of these traits fit me:

Type 1. The Discouraged Borderline:

* Tearful and depressive episodes more frequent than rage episodes - kind of equal I'd say
* Loss or abandonment can trigger micro-psychotic episodes - no, never had any psychotic symptoms
* Self-Persecution - not sure what this means, does it mean I think others are persecuting me (I do) or does it mean I persecute myself (I don't)?
* Aloneness - another one I don't quite understand, due to autism I like being alone and seldom feel lonely
* Paranoia - sometimes, if I'm already upset any slight thing will be interpreted as an attack on me
* Delicate, easily injured - yes, oh yes
* Victimized, evokes sympathy and concern - I was victimized, sometimes people act sympathetic and sometimes they further victimize me
* Cycle of depression and withdrawal - not sure what this means, I have depression at times but haven't noticed any kind of cycle
* Anger can take others by surprise - yes, though I always know it's coming, others don't
* Help-seeking/rejecting and so others may feel helpless - well, a lot of times people offer help that doesn't work for me, and being autistic I tend to be blunt in saying so, so it may seem like I seek help only to reject it, but I really do want help if it's something that'll actually work for me
* Passive and/or permissive - not really, except when babysitting children
* Irresponsible behavior - not deliberately, autism affects organizational skills so I often fail to fulfill my responsibilities even though I tried hard to do so
* Other people have to take over - no, I tend to resent when someone else takes over a project of mine
* Suffers from chronic or recurrent illness - asthma, but not sure how this relates
* Somatic complaints - yes, definitely, more so when I was a schoolkid and being bullied everyday.
* Uses drugs, alcohol, food, money, or sex to self soothe - no
* Abandonment triggers suicidal feelings and desperate acts - desperate acts definitely, suicidal feelings not so much, I never actually want to die but my brain will start playing images of how I could use the random things in my environment to kill or seriously maim myself
* More likely to deprive rather than indulge herself - no
* Uses Fantasy to escape reality - oh, yes, as a child I'd pretend to be a dog or a cat and tell my parents 'animals don't go to school', I was also obsessed with the Animorphs series and convinced myself that several of my teachers were Controllers (people possessed by a mind-controlling alien race)
* Gives away or destroys good things - no
* “I’m not good enough”- Self invalidation - no


Type 2. The Petulant (Angry) Borderline

* Fearful and anxious - yes
* Inner experience is persecution, suffers from persecutory anxiety - yes, I feel like the whole world is against me sometimes
* Expects to lose what they need, consequently are possessive and controlling - no, I expect to always have it then get devastated when I think I've lost it
* Behavior is the result of feeling violated, "doesn’t want to be exposed" - often I'll have a meltdown over someone not respecting my boundaries, for example autism causes sensory sensitivities and while I usually shutdown to sensory overload (instead of acting out I just loose skills and get withdrawn) if I get the sense that someone is deliberately exposing me to overloading stimuli I'll have a meltdown instead, also I can't say straightforwardly how I feel and what I need but instead must code it in 'attacking language' so I don't feel too vulnerable
* Shuts others out - sometimes, more often I'll seek help but in a way that tends to push them away
* Possessive and controlling - sometimes
* Reclusive - yes
* Can be overprotective and insulate others - used to be with my younger brother but he got too old for that
* “Social phobics” / Social Anxiety Disorder - some social anxiety, mostly because I'm autistic so I was bullied a lot for acting weird and have no idea how someone is reacting to me until they do something really obvious
* Ruminates - definitely
* Looks for cause for own pain - constantly
* Intensely Jealous - no
* Is acutely perceptive - no sure, I have sensitive senses due to autism but I also overfocus and tune stuff out a lot
* Heightened state of alarm, can be a consequence of PTSD - yes, and in fact my actual diagnoses are autism and PTSD
* May be superstitious - no, I think that stuff is nonsense, I'm even an atheist because I don't see any evidence that God exists (as well as because my horrible school was Christian)
* Magical thinking - no
* Intolerant to pain and illness - yes to pain, but I actually enjoy being mildly sick because I was so school-phobic as a kid and associated being sick with staying home
* Inability to self soothe - oh, yes, this is my biggest problem, when I have a meltdown I cannot calm myself down and if my parents leave me alone I'll start imagining all the ways I can seriously hurt myself (eg tying a ribbon round my neck, stabbing a knitting needle into my arm) and get scared by those thoughts and chase down my parents to scream at them in the hopes that they'll figure out how to calm me down
* Food, alcohol, sex to self soothe - no
* Evokes guilt and anxiety in others - I have no idea
* Suicidal tendencies evoke guilt and fear in therapists - no

Type 3. The Impulsive Borderline

* Fear and terror projected on to others - not sure what this means, does it mean that when I'm scared I think someone else is instead (I don't, I know I'm scared and I know exactly why)?
* Those around must emotionally sacrifice - yes
* No ability to mentalize - well, autism impairs mentalizing supposedly, but I'm actually OK at taking other people perspectives provided I have the proper information (I can't read body language) and I'm not too overwhelmed by my own emotions
* Behaviors: lying, exploitativeness, promiscuity,verbal abuse, cold and withholding - no
* Least likely to seek help/treatment on their own - I have sought help many times but it hasn't been as effective as self-therapy
* Suicidal and homicidal tendencies seen in this type more so than others - no, slight suicidal tendencies but never any homicidal ones
* Primary Emotion Expression is Rage - not really, I'll act a mix of enraged and sad and scared when really it's all just sadness and fear with no anger at all
* Hostility hides fear - definitely yes
* Intrusive and violatesboundaries/limits of others - not deliberately, autism means I sometimes don't know I'm intruding
* When emotionally-dysregulated, describes feeling“evil” - I used to feel evil because my school told me I would go to Hell for my behavior, but as I've gotten a better understanding of psychology I don't feel evil at all (I'm not sure evil even exists)
* Gloomy - sometimes
* Easily agitated - yes
* Seductive - not at all, I'm asexual and terrified of others coming on to me so I do my best to not appear seductive at all
* Potentially suicidal - no, I'd never actually act on it
* Poor prognosis for treatment - I hope not!

Type 4. The Self-Destructive Borderline

* Requires special privileges - kind of, I have special needs so shouldn't I get special privileges?
* Mirror hungry - don't know what this means, I don't really like my own reflection because for some reason I never look the way I think I look (not better or worse, just different)
* Emptiness primary emotional statecomes from emotional deprivation and triggers anger - no, I only feel empty inside when I'm going into shutdown
* Primarily feels deprivation and envy - no, I could probably count on one hand the number of people I've ever envied, I usually don't compare my lot with others at all
* Need to be mirrored - what does this mean? if it means having someone copy my actions, that ranges from amusing to annoying depending on context, but if they mean wanting someone to listen and just restate what I just said instead of arguing about my feelings, that's what helps me calm down from a meltdown
* Attention is mandatory - no, I don't want attention for its own sake, only if I get something out of it
* Seeks attention or prominence - no, though people have thought I was attention-seeking when I wasn't
* Demands loyalty - definitely, and I'll put people through tests to prove it, too
* When there is a sense of betrayal,punishment will ensue - definitely!
* Hysterical reactions - do they mean in the sense of old-style hysteria, where they go blind or get paralyzed or whatever? closest I have to that is losing the ability to talk when I'm overloaded, and that's pretty standard for autistic people
* Intrusive/violates boundaries - not deliberately, but occasionally due to poor social skills
* Rules do not apply - kind of uncomfortable with saying so but yeah, kind of, though usually it's more that I think the rule is wrong and shouldn't apply to anyone instead of thinking I should get away with stuff that others don't
* Numb the panic and contact andcontrol over some new object - OK, I didn't parse that one at all
* Acquire and control self-object dyad - nor that one
* Inward-turning - yes, I'm pretty focused on myself, but this might be because I'm autistic
* High strung and moody - definitely
* Ambitious - not really, I'd like to be a psychology researcher and I fantasize about becoming a big name in the field but really I'd be content just if I manage to get the answers to some of my interesting research questions, even if that means others stealing my ideas I wouldn't mind that at all
* Suicide risk - no

I think the one that fits me best is petulant type.

Ettina wrote:I'm subclinical borderine,

I'm sorry, but what exactly is a subclinical borderline and where did you hear that term?

just curious...

Although I exhibit some of the tendencies of the Self-Destructive, I definitely fit the criteria for a Discouraged BPD, so that's what I picked. I'm classed as high functioning, and you'll understand why I mention this in the next paragraph.

Now here is an interesting follow-up to the sub-categories question. Not only what sub-classification are you, but are you considered a high or low functioning Borderline? I'm wondering if there are any correlations between the two, based on the symptoms exhibited.

See? I told you you'd understand why. It'd be pretty silly of me to ask the question of all of you without answering it myself, now wouldn't it?

Maybe she means she's not quite as messed up as me?

Probably more of a sweetheart who has it easy.....like you. LOL

JohnnyBlaze wrote:Although I exhibit some of the tendencies of the Self-Destructive, I definitely fit the criteria for a Discouraged BPD, so that's what I picked. I'm classed as high functioning, and you'll understand why I mention this in the next paragraph.

Now here is an interesting follow-up to the sub-categories question. Not only what sub-classification are you, but are you considered a high or low functioning Borderline? I'm wondering if there are any correlations between the two, based on the symptoms exhibited.

See? I told you you'd understand why. It'd be pretty silly of me to ask the question of all of you without answering it myself, now wouldn't it?

that's an interesting question, however unlike you I think I am "low-functioning" and Discouraged. It could be just because I refuse to do things because I'm trying to protect my feelings or sanity or whatever, staying in the comfort zone, and I miss out on everything but I can't help myself. But yea low-functioning because I haven't worked in almost a year and can't consider going back to work without immediately feeling suicidal... bleh