Seeking interesting facts about psychology/psychiatry?
Want to express how much or how little it's done for you?
How about reading through experiences and knowing you're not alone?
Sure, there's the anti-psych forum and everyone here has some similar experiences, but there's also mentaltruths.wordpress.com. Check it out. See what it's like. It's not a forum, it's a blog, but hey, maybe you can learn something new! Everyone likes learning new things! And if you don't like learning new things, come and read some rants written by a lunatic all for your entertainment! If you don't like that then just give it a look for no good reason at all! And if you don't want to do any of that then . . . well I suppose you can disregard this entire entry.
And by disregard I mean go to the link anyway.
Have a great day!

I can't believe I haven't utilized this area to it's full potential yet.

I"m not sure whether or not I hate being alone. Sometimes I feel as if I get legitimately lonely and that I need the company of others, but when i'm around them I'm reminded how hard it is to keep up the facade I've hid behind for so many years. Friendships are so difficult to hold, for me. I don't think I've ever learned how to keep a healthy one or the skills needed to start a healthy one. That being said, I'm not sure I'm mad at that or not.

I'm also not sure if I want to be that extrovert people have always wanted me to be. I enjoy the worlds inside of my head and if they don't like that then they don't have to be around me. I do admit I should probably acquire some basic skills . . . I won't make it far in the psychiatric world if i'm not a team player and after all one of my passions lies in helping people; I have to learn the skills for them.

So many people bash psychiatry and they have the absolute right to. There's so much controversy on the outside of the industry and the inside of the industry. But I notice people blame the psychiatrists prescribing the medication without also blaming the APA's #######5 criteria in the DSM, the psycho-pharmaceutical companies that bribe the researchers into putting out false data (publication bias), and the fact that lies are the foundation of everything. Studies of SSRI treatment in place of heavy, dangerous antipsychotics get pushed under the rug because money is the object of the game.

Given, there are many psychiatrist who fall prey to this and believe everything they learned in medical school and from their mentors, so they have the right to be blamed when they prescribe a long list of medications to someone who could do just as well with some basic talk therapy. I call myself anti-psychiatry, but i'm really anti-greed and anti-ignorance. I think my problems weigh pale in comparison to the problems of the industry.

What any of this has to do with being alone, i have no idea. I think i think too much too quickly

Getting sick of my symptoms being disregarded. Who in their right mind thinks it's alright to say "that's stupid" when you tell them how you're feeling or what you're going through? I understand some people don't have the complete ability to comprehend some of the loss of control that comes with have severe anxiety, but that doesn't give them the right to disregard something I'm feeling, correct? I tend not to argue with this person, as he happens to be my significant other and don't feel like it's necessary to start an argument.

We have a good relationship that is only rocky when my anxiety is involved. I easily forgave him when he said I would have ended up alone if he wouldn't have came along not because I believed it but because he admitted he shouldn't have said it. But something in my gut warned me it was the start of something greater. I know he experienced a depressive period in his life, which I sympathize with since take it day by day with my depression. He pushed himself through it and of course the bad situations that were pretty much causing the depression removed themselves. What he doesn't seem to get is that I've been dealing with chronic depression for a little over three years because of an anxiety disorder I've been dealing with for 13. Obviously, if I could have pushed myself through it like him, if my anxiety could also move out like his situations did, I would have been cured by now.

For him to constantly remind me I have to deal with people at some point in my life only enrages me. Of course I do! I'm on Earth! It's exhausting and painful to confront your greatest fear every day and not have anyone to give recognition to the the fact that you have managed to do so. I want to get a job I can keep, I want to be able to walk out the front door comfortably, I want to be able to ask for help when I need it but it takes work and being beat down all the time doesn't help. My advice to myself is the same as my advice to others: get out while you can.

Mental illnesses aren't accepted, or believed, by everyone. I guess I've learned you can't convince people that you have a problem when they can't experience the problem on their own terms and I should probably stop trying. Honestly, I'd rather end up alone than have people constantly disregarding who I am.

I call my brain the ghost house because sometimes it's completely void of life and all you can feel is a cold, desolate emptiness. Other times it’s full of life and confidence; normal fluctuations I would think everyone experiences once in a while.

But summer's coming, and I’m anticipating a larger void of life going on in the ghost house than usual. It's funny that Seasonal Affective Disorder specifies winter as the season people get depression. Summer is my dreaded season. In a town where the sun shines hot in the sky through the afternoon and the ocean breeze compensates for the heat, you can practically feel the rumble of tourists stomping their way from the valley, from the north, and from the hills into our overpriced hotels and vacation rentals. They crowd the beaches like ants! So I shut my blinds, lock my door, and curl in the fetal position on my bed waiting for night to fall, the only safe time to walk through my front door.

I used to say I hated people, but that just isn't the case. Social Anxiety isn't about hatred or being callous or rude, it's about being uncomfortable around your own species. It's about hypersensitivity to criticisms, to people's vocal tones, to people's expressions, and to your own emotions. It's about physical tremors, shortened breath, reddened cheeks, and unsatisfied social lives. Asking questions for clarification unleashes mental warfare in your mind--what if the question is stupid? What if someone laughs? No, they're definitely going to laugh; they're going to think I'm stupid, they already do anyway--and by the time the argument between you and the anxiety stalemates, the opportunity to ask the question is lost. So Social Anxiety is also about lost opportunities.

Mental health issues diminish the quality of life in such ways. It's hard to get understanding, support, and help for things unseen. A pill could subdue the physical reactions--your General Physician will be sure to convince you of that--but it doesn't always stop the cycling, near uncontrollable thoughts of people's opinions of you, of that one time in class last week you tripped on your shoe lace and slammed into the professor's table, or that one time in the street last month you ran across the road and your shoe fell off in front of that busy restaurant, or that time last semester you answered a question wrong in class and there were a few giggles. If you have friends, they won't always understand and may get annoyed back your lack of enthusiasm to leave your house. Significant others, even, may give you a cold shoulder.

The problem is, everyone experiences anxiety and of those who experience it in an average amount get over it fairly quickly, dismiss it as a factor of life. And indeed they are correct; it is a factor of life. But just as a minor cut may get infected and grow into a malignant wound or what was perceived as a benign cancer cell could sprout a venomous twin, normal psychopathology like anxiety can morph into a hideous, near uncontrollable evil. Others can't be in your head when you're experiencing the cycling thoughts or when your mind blanks, or when you struggle to start a conversation, to hold a conversation, or to be part of a conversation, or to accept any of it is happening to you.

This is where I tend to grow envious of other disorders. I would never DARE of wishing for Bipolar disorder or a Schizophrenia Spectrum disorder, but it is a true fact those suffering with such disorders have visible symptoms much more prominent and obvious than those of us suffering through something like Social Anxiety disorder. It doesn't make anyone's pain less or more significant, and because their symptoms are more visible they face some pretty heartbreaking stigma. It certainly is true the other disorders can be harder to treat than an anxiety disorder but most with severe social anxiety disorder don't have nearly enough confidence to ask for help. We aren't going to end up in a mental health hospital spouting dis...

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