Humiliation: Gay? Straight? Weird?

I had those same feelings, of desiring humiliation from men, and acted on them. I am a 50 year old biwm who is addicted to gay bathhouses. I rent a small room, keep the door open, and invite random strangers in to use me and humiliate me. I keep the door open so others can watch. I prefer anal as the ultimate in humiliation. No talking, just random men on top of me. Used to feel guilty. Not so much anymore. Go about once per week. My favorite part of the week.

Hi, I'm new to this site. I think it's great that it's here. I really relate to your story forumhelp. I use to get turned on by fantasizing about being touched by men. I was first attracted to women, and fantasized about them but then it's as if I got bored of that. I still fantasize about both men and women. I can control it for awhile too then it comes back. So i really relate with u. I have acted on those fantasies with men but I have never had feelings or been with a man emotionally only sexual. Sometimes I use to blame my desire for the attention of men or sexual desire because i didn't have a close connection with my dad when i was growing up but now we do. I still like to fantasize about men though and I also sometimes still have sexual relations with men. Having said that I would love to settle down with a nice girl and i wouldn't mind opening up to her about all these things but the fear and anxiety with me when i meet women is like i think they are not good enough or i get bored i don't know maybe lack of confidence but anyway its good that this site is here and i can relate. thanks. any comments please

I agree that anyone telling you that the habits that are destroying you aren't bad, is intellectually dishonest. Eating food isn't bad. When your entire life revolves around food, you can kill yourself by overeating. Of course you are right to want to overcome this.

That said, did you have any early sexual encounters that involved humiliation? Were you ever exposed to rape porn in your youth? I get the impression you had some sort of childhood trauma involving humiliation that you need to resolve and that is where a,good sex addiction therapist could help you. Good luck.