How do I tell my mother's new bf he isn't my dad?

by **karen2121** » Thu Nov 11, 2010 10:51 am

Hello everyone.

I'm Karen. I'm 20 years old. My mother has been seeing someone for about 6 months. He's okay, we get along well enough, however I feel as though he is trying to impose himself in my life in the role of "father", by telling me what to do, involving himself when my mother and I argue, trying to discipline me, despite the fact I am an adult. We all live together. He knows about my abuse past. How do I let him know I don't need or want another father?

Thanks.

karen2121 wrote:Hello everyone.

I'm Karen. I'm 20 years old. My mother has been seeing someone for about 6 months. He's okay, we get along well enough, however I feel as though he is trying to impose himself in my life in the role of "father", by telling me what to do, involving himself when my mother and I argue, trying to discipline me, despite the fact I am an adult. We all live together. He knows about my abuse past. How do I let him know I don't need or want another father?

Thanks.

Hello Karen2121

In your first post you were a Step-mother and you were concerned because your step-son was checking you out in the swimming pool. You edited your first post, right now. In the above new post you are now 20 years old and you are now complaining from your mother's new boyfriend.
No comments.

by **jasmin** » Thu Nov 11, 2010 12:38 pm

Karen, you probably need to make a life for yourself and get away from the family environment a bit. He might get the message if he sees you on your own two feet. Or you could just tell him to stay out of stuff that isn't his business.

by **karen2121** » Fri Nov 12, 2010 3:03 pm

I was posting for a friend, we were together and made the post together. She has now told me she doesn't wish to talk about it online now since she has a family therapist. Sorry for the confusion!!

MapleSyrup wrote:
karen2121 wrote:Hello everyone.

I'm Karen. I'm 20 years old. My mother has been seeing someone for about 6 months. He's okay, we get along well enough, however I feel as though he is trying to impose himself in my life in the role of "father", by telling me what to do, involving himself when my mother and I argue, trying to discipline me, despite the fact I am an adult. We all live together. He knows about my abuse past. How do I let him know I don't need or want another father?

Thanks.

Hello Karen2121

In your first post you were a Step-mother and you were concerned because your step-son was checking you out in the swimming pool. You edited your first post, right now. In the above new post you are now 20 years old and you are now complaining from your mother's new boyfriend.
No comments.

by **Onebravegirl** » Fri Nov 12, 2010 3:57 pm

I say communication is the key here.
A direct question might be a good idea.
"What are you doing? I'm 20 years old and I have not invited your opinion. You don't know me, you don't know my mother and I's relationship. If I want your input I will ask for it."
You may want to put in nicer than that but the general idea is that his opinion is not invited or welcome.
Get out of that house by the way. Go get a job, save some money and get a small place for yourself. Its time you used your wings!
Best wishes hun,
One

How do I tell my mother's new bf he isn't my dad?

How do I tell my mother's new bf he isn't my dad?

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