Recurring Dreams

This is kind of a random topic, but I have three recurring dreams which I've had for years now. I dream at least one of them at least once a week, and I still haven't figured out what they're about.

First dream: I'm back at school, having to do my A-Levels again, and I'm the age I am now. I feel stressed because I haven't studied for the exams, but I also feel frustrated and ashamed at still being at school even though I'm 'grown up'.

Second dream: I'm living in a house with 'secret rooms'. These are rooms I never go into because they're dirty, dilapidated and falling apart. They're usually infested with spiders (I'm terrified of spiders!). I feel daunted by these rooms because I know I haven't got the time, energy, money or ability to make them liveable. Sometimes I'm afraid to go in them because I know there is something frightening inside. A variation of this dream is that there is a room in my house which is very difficult to get to. It can only be accessed by climbing through a high-up opening, crawling through a narrow tunnel, etc. These rooms are also in a dilapidated, dirty state. Sometimes if I go into this room, I get trapped there.

Third dream/nightmare. ***Possible trigger***

Concentration camp dreams.

I'm in a concentration camp, and am witnessing the most horrific tortures and mutilations. I usually have no body, and am often floating above what is going on. Sometimes I'm in a cell/torture room, seeing the torturers at work, other times I am outside in the camp, floating above pits full of decaying, emaciated, suffering people. In one dream, I was outside the camp, walking past the fence, and could smell the smell of death and filth. In all of these dreams, I know that if I draw attention to myself, I will join the people being tortured and there will be no escape. These are the dreams which stay with me for the rest of the day, making me feel sick, terrified and full of horror.

Does anyone else have recurring dreams and how did you go about figuring them out (if you have)? I'm getting kind of tired of dreaming the same thing all the time!

Saw there were no posts yet..don't lose heart....I want to give it some thought before replying.... Question though: are there any other significant people/figures in your first two dreams. Also - have you asked any of your alters if they have experienced any of these themselves? Finally - are there any significant colors or other sensory items (smells, etc) in the dreams?

HopeIsHere wrote:Saw there were no posts yet..don't lose heart....

That's OK! I usually see it as an achievement that I have the courage to post at all. Replies are a bonus

HopeIsHere wrote:are there any other significant people/figures in your first two dreams.

No, usually random people in the first, just me in the second.

HopeIsHere wrote:Also - have you asked any of your alters if they have experienced any of these themselves?

I haven't got alters, my diagnosis is C-PTSD, I just gatecrash here! My T asked me the same question when I told him about the torture nightmares, I said no but given that I don't remember some things, I'm going to say, I sure as hell hope not

HopeIsHere wrote:Finally - are there any significant colors or other sensory items (smells, etc) in the dreams?

I was going to say no to this, but actually there is usually a smell of damp/dirt/neglect in the 'house' dreams. I HATE places that smell of damp irl, it makes me feel physically sick.

First dream- no clue. Have you been considering going back to school to further your education?

Second dream- I've had similar ones. dissociative-identity/topic84195.html

Third dream- Have you begun processing your trauma memories? I have memories of floating out the window at night when I was little. Floating above/out of body experiences are common with trauma.

In all of these dreams, I know that if I draw attention to myself, I will join the people being tortured and there will be no escape.

How DIDdy of you. Lol. Yeah, I know the feeling though. If you apply that to real life though, that is what you did. You left while your others took the pain for you. Maybe it is time to take the pain back from them and deal with it all.

These kind of dreams suck, but someone is trying to show you something. Good luck.

Aside from this forum, I like to go here for some clues:http://www.dreammoods.com/
Just to add on to what the others have said here....

1. I usually dream of school as a symbol of learning something. Except that one time where it turned out my parts were telling be about a class I had actually forgotten, it took months to figure out it was a real class. So....

2.Yeah, house dreams! Each room had a part to discover, then there are outbuildings(like cast away parts), one's locked in rooms(trapped parts), broken furniture in process of cleaning up(healing), anyway, yeah those house dreams...

3. That reminds me of parts stuck in trauma. Trapped, in pain and despair.

I know that if I draw attention to myself, I will join the people being tortured and there will be no escape.

I've had that element as well in my torture dreams. In those situations, some of us who were strong enough to escape worked on a plan to return and free those trapped.

So glad others have some ideas and links! Here are my thoughts:

Dream 1) did you complete your education - this could be that desire of finishing but the other thing is what was already suggested - something that you are being asked to do by someone in authority (even if they are not seen) that you are not only stressed about - but deep down know you are capable of doing. This could look like a new program, incentive, responsibility at work. Those are stressful because you still have your boss who expects you to do well and you know you can (deep down) but still wonder if you will do it right, as good as someone else, etc...

Dream 2) what are you denying yourself? about yourself? if we go completely non-DID here where past trauma might be the issue - what i wonder is what you might be denying that is intrinsic to who you are or want to be ie...I really wish I could be an author. This is an unrealized 'dream' because I don't have the money, the time, the energy...to make it happen...what do you want for yourself or those you care about that (if you had the time, energy, money, etc to make happen) you would? what are you neglecting, forgetting, etc that may not be NECESSARY (spare room) but could make you feel more complete, full, satisfied?? Are these dreams/desires something you have kept secret from others because you want them to know you are 'ok' with where you are? Do you feel that if you were to do it - it might be harmful? (ie..in my case, if I forego my job to seek a writing career - will I be trapped now by my choice and potentially make things 'worse' by pursuing this dream?)

Dream 3) Ok..trying to not suggest DID here...but the disembodied aspect makes me feel that you were dissociated when you saw something bad happening or having happen to you. SO..what else could it be? Well, it could be that you read or saw or studied something specifically dealing with this matter in a literal sense at a young age and are still processing the horror of it. These memories may be triggered by the sensationalism of such violence on media where these torturing things still happen....or some of the movies out there...and if you feel empathy towards the victims - you almost can have a survivor's guilt... the other thing it makes me feel is that if you have PTSD - there is a reason you have it. And if you were hurt by someone who made you feel it was your fault you were hurt...well...that feeling might still be with you/hence the 'I might end up with them if not careful..."

That's my two cents....

ashesoflife wrote:Second dream- I've had similar ones. dissociative-identity/topic84195.html

I've read this thread before and it creeped me out because it felt so much like a combination of my dreams 'Type 1 and 2', if you see what I mean. I admire you so much for being willing to explore this stuff. I know there are dark and scary places in my head, and I really don't want to go there again.

Borg wrote:2.Yeah, house dreams! Each room had a part to discover, then there are outbuildings(like cast away parts), one's locked in rooms(trapped parts), broken furniture in process of cleaning up(healing), anyway, yeah those house dreams...3. That reminds me of parts stuck in trauma. Trapped, in pain and despair.

Hmm. These types of dreams seem to be quite common here It does feel like there's a link to trauma and part of me is stuck. Even the school dreams feel like part of it, constantly reliving a time in my life that was very difficult and stressful (I had a severe depressive/suicidal episode around that time but don't know exactly what triggered it.)

Thanks for all your replies. It helps to know I'm not alone. I've been having so many disturbing dreams lately (even more than the ones listed here!) Something's up

Owleyes wrote:I've been having so many disturbing dreams lately (even more than the ones listed here!) Something's up

http://vitals.msnbc.msn.com/_news/2011/ ... ut-it?lite

But scientists say they now know what dreams are for: they sooth the sting out of troubling memories. And when dreams don’t do their job, horrific memories can take over a person’s life, as they do with PTSD, a new study suggests.

Try to keep a notebook by the bed. Write the dreams down with as much detail as possible as soon as you wake up. Look for reoccurring themes, characters, emotions, ect. After you do this for a while, you might notice a pattern. It could give you clues to the parts of your memories you are missing (one of the features of PSTD is that you don't remember some parts of the trauma). Try to process the dreams- the emotions you felt during the dream is more important than the context usually.

After a while of writing them down, you may notice the nightmares happen less and less. It is a small coping trick that might work for you. Good luck.

Thanks, I'll give it a try!

Owleyes wrote:Second dream: I'm living in a house with 'secret rooms'. These are rooms I never go into because they're dirty, dilapidated and falling apart. They're usually infested with spiders (I'm terrified of spiders!). I feel daunted by these rooms because I know I haven't got the time, energy, money or ability to make them liveable. Sometimes I'm afraid to go in them because I know there is something frightening inside. A variation of this dream is that there is a room in my house which is very difficult to get to. It can only be accessed by climbing through a high-up opening, crawling through a narrow tunnel, etc. These rooms are also in a dilapidated, dirty state. Sometimes if I go into this room, I get trapped there.

Owleyes, all I can say is that I've had recurring dreams like these my whole life, especially the ridiculously hard rooms to get to, having to go through claustrophia-triggering tunnels. Variations of rooms in a house I recognize or don't. More recently, I've dreamed that I'm surprised to keep finding rooms I didn't know existed in my own condo. When I came on this board last year I had just discovered I had 7 alters. I now know of 15. The parallels could not be more clear to me. The major difference is that until this past year, I never actually ended up going into these rooms, as far as I can recall. I discovered odd rooms were there and wanted to reach them, but didn't enter or didn't recall entering them, for whatever reason. The general symbolism in my dreams has been this: rooms = alters.