I'm Scared

I'm scared. The thoughts of the abuse are haunting me. The psychotic shadow people hallucinations are scaring me. I keep seeing them. All I want are my toys. But we don't have any. I don't want to sleep because I am scared she will be there in my dreams. I just want to escape from all the pain.

- Little Jesse

We are so sorry for you, my little one. My heart weaps for you and all that happened to you. A boy your age should not have to worry about these things. He should be able to play all day and have fun. But we know bad things can happen to children. Can you try to think about how you are remembering some of these things? They can feel very bad but they happened before today. Very soon you will be able to tell Jesse and the others everything that happened and you will feel better.

It's okay to be scared. We all become scared sometimes. Maybe you can remember to call for Jason to be near when the shadow people come? You will be safer with some of the others nearby. You don't have to be completely alone now. There are big strong people around who can help you feel safer even if you can't see them. The nightmares will not last forever, they will end.

Can you think about what type of toy you might really like to have? Then you could ask Jesse if he can find one like it for you.

Hello Little Jesse,

I'm sorry to hear you are scared. Do you think maybe having some toys would help you be less afraid of all the scary things? Maybe you could ask one of the others if they would buy a toy for you... What type of toy would you like?

You have no toys? That is sad... can you ask for some? It may help you not to feel so scared if you had some toys to play with. Alice who is a child like you likes colouiring in books and soft toys and puzzles. She loves coming out to do something fun. I think you could ask for something to make you happy ?

Thank you for all the nice responses. She wasn't in our dreams last night. I want toys but Host Jesse doesnt have much money. Host Jesse has some from when he was little but they are stored away. I am still scared and frustrated because no one understands us. I do have some coloring books though. Maybe that will help.

What about a stuffed animal? They are not much money, and one of the others can get one from a thrift store to save even more money. We get lots of stuffed animals that way

I have a stuffed wolfie named Timber, and whoever's friends with him is friends with me My best friend and my T both like him a lot

I will try that. Or just get host Jesse to pull out some of his old toys. We all feel very misunderstood

aw i'm sorry nobody understands you. You gotta have your toys if you can get em! Tell them it will help you feel safe You can send me a private message if you want to cuz I like to here from other people who I can kinda relate to

Little Jesse is feeling a little better. I found him some coloring books which helped him. He is back inside now. But we still feel misunderstood. No one really wants to listen or they jump to conclusions that I'm ignoring them when in reality I don't know how to express what I'm going through or how I feel.

It sucks.

justjesse wrote:No one really wants to listen or they jump to conclusions that I'm ignoring them when in reality I don't know how to express what I'm going through or how I feel.

Who jumps to conclusions? and who are 'them'?

I'm sorry you feel misunderstood. I hope we haven't upset you by what we have said about Little Jesse needing some toys.

Bourbon