What to do with abusers?

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I had someone like that, that would intentionally manipulate and try to use us against each other
to get what they wanted. It was horrible.

I cut off all contact. It was really hard, especially since they tried doing everything to get
us back, but we all had to agree on the inside that we could NOT talk to this person no matter what.
The best thing that you can do, is that once it's possible, cut them out completely.

i don't have one that i like see everyday ,but i sorta live in fear that one day he will show up ,if he did i know i'd switch to one of the others and i would be his . he had total control of me -us only shadow fought him and damn near got us killed.guess i should say this is the first time i ever thought in terms of us ,it was easy to think hey your just bonkers there is no us .i think thats progress ,not sure .but seeing others talk has helped me so much .the abuser is family and he served his 7 years and is out there somewhere.sooner or later he will come for me ,just hope i have a chance but i think i'd just fall down before him and be his again .sorry don't mean to hijack the thread.my only hope is he reoffends and gets caught before ho comes for me .i'm not 11 anymore so i'm probably next on his list after he finds more victims

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We'reREAL wrote:

evanessence wrote:i don't have one that i like see everyday ,but i sorta live in fear that one day he will show up ,if he did i know i'd switch to one of the others and i would be his . he had total control of me -us only shadow fought him and damn near got us killed.

dude, dont live anywhere near him. dumb as bailey moved right near our abuser. stupid bitch. nice to be clueless. cant really blame her cuz he didn't live there at the time he kind of followed. i hope for your sake that you never have to deal with it.

if you are in our situation, we can't win and he knows it. bailey doesn't believe we exist-- along with half of society she wouldn't dare tell anyone. i have to take it or he will do it to the kids, so i'm screwed.
it's really true what he says ya know. why would they believe someone who can't even get it straight who i am from one minute to the next? he's created the perfect toy.
the response(or lack of) on this board proves that. i know we were foolish but i'll not let caleb end up like jessica.

nothing they say is true . it's all about control and guilt maybe it's not possible to fight him but don't let his crimes become your shame .i think the first step in fighting is to say ok i didn't cause this ,i don't deserve this no matter what they say.second step is believing it

Is there no way you can move? Just to be farther away from him?

We'reREAL wrote:it's really true what he says ya know. why would they believe someone who can't even get it straight who i am from one minute to the next?

No, don't think like that. Anyone who knows about DID should believe you. Like evanessence said, he's just trying to mess with your mind, so it'll be easier to control you. If you don't think anyone will believe you, you won't even try to get help, and that's what he wants.

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We'reREAL wrote:sure, yet again. maybe do the name change thing again. but as i said we were living here 1st and he did just end up here anyway. we are a whole 2 states and 700 and some odd miles away.
how much are we going to dedicate to running?

I didn't mean running away; just moving somewhere farther away, so he won't have such easy access to you. But I guess you're right, if he followed you before, he might do it again

Where is he attacking you guys? At his place, yours, or is he just showing up at the places you guys are at?

We'reREAL wrote:when jesse showed back up at the hospital in a cop car with scrapes and bruises miss lisa had her examined and even with proof the courts didn't want to touch it with what was in our psych records.

What the hell? Because what, they think you could have done it to yourself? It really shouldn't matter if you have a psych record, because what he did was still illegal

We'reREAL wrote:canolime, i think delana told you the name of the book. that about the time when we were in the hospital was in the book.

Yeah, she did...

I know restraining orders are barely worth more than crap, but would it be possible to get one on him? Of course I don't know if that would make it better, or just make him mad

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