***Trigger Warning*** (Inner world fights)

We aren't doing good. There have been A LOT of fights the last few months- in our inner world. Today was one of the worst.


Trigger warning:
fight details


The fight was between two shapeshifters (a male, and female one). They attacked each other in dragon form. Both of them were hurt badly- but- the female was hurt the worst. She's demanding that we don't do anything. She doesn't want us to punish him- but yet he really hurt her. What he did wasn't necessary at all. He completely destroyed her wings (which really hurt her).


We're not sure what to do. She claims she'll be really mad at us if we take action against him. However- it doesn't feel right to do nothing.

Update:

She feels really bad about getting into a fight with him. Supposedly she's the one who started the fight. He made her mad at first however. He said something really hurtful to her. He was saying really horrible stuff to her for weeks- but today was especially hurtful. She said she just "snapped". She said she doesn't know why. That's unlike her to get into a fight. She hasn't been doing good (emotionally) lately- however.

He won't make any comment on the situation- but she said he apologized to her. We're not sure if he did or not. Maybe she's just saying that to help protect him. We do know however that all of the troublemakers- Except him- laughed at her (following the fight). We feel that might be a sign he feels bad.

We're not sure what to do. We're just one horrible mess yet. It's been one fight after the other lately. We haven't talked about them- because- our host feels as if she's losing her mind again.

We know what triggered the "downhill spiral". It was the bad news we got regarding our dad. Ever since that day- everything's been chaotic.

Any ideas on stopping the fights? I guess the main thing to do would be to figure out why they are happening in the first place. The only problem with that is- we don't know.

Sometimes people get angry as a way of avoiding grief. If it's a loss they both share, they might fight with each other and blame each other--instead of being in touch with how sad they both are. Just an idea since you all suffered a difficult loss so recently.

In my humble opinion from a keeper of peace in the inside, what I do when people start to argue is, separate them so they cannot reach each-other nor talk to each-other, and set them up on a videogame. First, fighting videogames, and when the aggressivity has calmed down, more and more cooperative ones. And after they managed cooperative videogames, then I take them with me to talk about it. Usually they realize they've been wrong to try to solve the issue by hitting each-other, and either make peace, or agree that they are not meant to interact and go their separate way.

Dunno if it can be done in other inner worlds though.

~Theia~

A while ago No-one beat up Karen because she was jealous of the friendship she had with Beth. They're seperated now and I don't think Karen will forgive and forget easily Because she's very anti violence and wouldn't see it as she needs to forgive that. I'm just giving it time at the moment.

Thank you all for your replies! We greatly appreciate them!

TheGangsAllHere wrote:Sometimes people get angry as a way of avoiding grief. If it's a loss they both share, they might fight with each other and blame each other--instead of being in touch with how sad they both are. Just an idea since you all suffered a difficult loss so recently.

Thank you! We do believe you're right about that. We believe our grief plays a major role in all of this.

ArbreMonde wrote:In my humble opinion from a keeper of peace in the inside, what I do when people start to argue is, separate them so they cannot reach each-other nor talk to each-other, and set them up on a videogame. First, fighting videogames, and when the aggressivity has calmed down, more and more cooperative ones. And after they managed cooperative videogames, then I take them with me to talk about it. Usually they realize they've been wrong to try to solve the issue by hitting each-other, and either make peace, or agree that they are not meant to interact and go their separate way.

Dunno if it can be done in other inner worlds though.

~Theia~

Thank you for the advice! We may be able to do something similar. We do have videogames in our world.

Sarandipity wrote:A while ago No-one beat up Karen because she was jealous of the friendship she had with Beth. They're seperated now and I don't think Karen will forgive and forget easily Because she's very anti violence and wouldn't see it as she needs to forgive that. I'm just giving it time at the moment.

We're sorry to hear about what happened. We hope they'll be able to make up sometime soon.




Update:

We have some good news today- regarding the situation. Both of them talked a little to each other. She apologized to him. She wrapped his injuries for him. He actually thanked her. I think he was shocked by what she did for him. He didn't return the favor- but- he did apologize to her. We hope that's a good sign.

However- his buddies aren't being nice to her. That may be a problem. I do know one of them tried to pick a fight with her today. Shockingly- the guy (she originally got into a fight with) helped prevent it.

Maybe, seeing that she was willing to fight if he ever throws bullcrap at her, made him realize she is a person and worthy of being treated as such - and now he realizes it's wrong to treat her like a doormat...

--Zami--