Finding New Alters: April 2017 Log

This is the wolfman from yesterday. I've seen now how I "behave myself" and I've found a name. It's Lyall. I'm Lyall. It means "shield wolf" or "wolf shield". That's my purpose in this system. I keep the others safe from our monthly hormone spike. They shouldn't have to worry about embarrassing changes in behavior now.

As for how I behave, my personality seems to have evolved throughout the day yesterday. I started out as a bit of a jerk but someone told me that was bad for the system, so I clammed up. My mood fluctuated, too. I went through spells of self-pride, anger, discomfort, enjoyment and sadness. The sadness turned into a longing for companionship, a lover. I wanted the girl I had in the dream. See, in the dream, she wasn't just any girl, she was my girlfriend. And I didn't want her body, I wanted her. I needed someone to love me, but I didn't know if she was real (an alter) or ... just my dream girl. It hurt. My heart really ached. It ached all evening. I couldn't search the internet for a name for myself without feeling sad, even, because thinking about myself made me think of her.

Just before bed, I finally met her. Yes, she's real, she's an alter. But ... she didn't love me. Unbearable pain! Disbelief! Desperation! Sorrow, sorrow, sorrow. I felt like my heart was going to fall out of my chest. (As a wolf, my quadupedal stance makes that seem very easy.) I knew, then, how a young man from outside our system feels about us. The exact same thing: to him, we're his soulmate. To us, he's no one special. OUCH! Poor man! How does he put up with the pain?

I took his example. I knew I couldn't force her to love me. I wanted her with me but I knew I couldn't charm her, either. I had to let her go. She was her own person and this was awkward for her. I just had to be strong and endure.

There is much more to the story, but I don't want to write it now. I must get ready for work, anyway. My story gets better, but I'm still trying to figure out how it happened. Maybe then I'll tell it to you all.

Cheers.
With love,

Lyall, the wolfman

Thanks for skipping me, Lyall. :p

Day 9

Hi, I'm James!

I'm a young person, a male. I have curly blond hair, and it's been said I resemble one of our body's cousins, but that means nothing to you since you don't know him. I have a proud, charming air that makes me seem deceitful; maybe I am, but I must be fooling myself, then, because I feel fully confident. I see myself as a showman, like a magician or a saleman, but I know better than to con people. (I believe in an afterlife and "just rewards".)

That's it. I'm shallow.

Lyall or his girlfriend Sydney should write next. Their relationship is rather interesting.

- James

Hi, I'm Sydney. (Not sure how I want to spell my name yet.)

I'm Lyall's 'girlfriend' alter. I guess I need to pick up where he left off so things will make more sense.

Right, I did not love Lyall but he had his whole heart set on me. I just didn't feel anything for him. In fact, I didn't feel much of anything at all. In mindspace, I used the imaginaton to compare our "hearts". Lyall's heart was large, plump and a healthy pink. Mine was tiny, shriveled and dark red. I thought maybe touching the hearts together, broad-side to broad-side, would help so I held them together that way. The two hearts then evened out in size and color. It seemed to work for me as I started to feel a stirring in the body's chest, but now Lyall felt void and loveless. I gave up on the imaginary healing after that.

So, it's just weird and difficult, my relationship with Lyall. I want to love him, but it's taking time, which I assume is normal. A lot of this, in fact, is so normal that it amazes us. For example, I've got "baby fever" and that scares him. Why, though? How could I get pregnant from him if we have the same body? He knows this, of course, but the fear of potential parenthood is still there. It's so strange.

Then, there are the weirder, multiple-mind things to deal with. For example, I don't know much about myself, but Lyall somehow knows things about me that I don't know. Once, before I had a name, we were having a heated conversation, and he suddenly called me "Sydney". We don't know why he said that, but, when he did, I immediately felt a thrill and perked up. "Sydney" seemed like a perfect fit for me. Then, I wondered, if he knows my name, what else does he know about me that I don't? I started drilling him by asking about my favorite color, which I'd never thought of before. He said "red" and it felt right to me. My favorite color is red. Then, I asked about my ideal vacation spot. The answer he gave was long and complicated, but everything he said sounded like my own thought process. I don't know how he knows these things about me, but it's working in his favor because now I have a genuine interest in him. Still, I seem to swing back and forth between wanting to be his girlfriend and feeling nothing for him.

Final thought: Based on my lack of personal development and Lyall's innate knowledge of my personal aspects, I'm guessing I'm a split off of him? We still don't know when and how he formed, though, so it's a mystery all around.

Day 13

Met a guy named Alijah-fire last night. He was one of our virtual pets from a website we obsessed over as a kid. I suppose that makes him a tulpa-type alter, or, to be technical, a non-introject fictive. Said website had its own unique made-up animal species one could adopt and care for, so basically, he's a dog. We imagined him as a furry, though, so 'dog-man' is more precise.

We hear word that another one of our virtual pet furries is in here: a catgirl named Lahmilji. (Note: We did not give her that name; she was adopted from a "pound".) Hoping to meet her soon.

Oddly, there is a snail in our system. Again, haven't met it. It's funny how we know about it. Janice can make herself look like anyone in our system, but her shape-shifting is limited to only looking like people in our system. So, yesterday, someone said something that scared her and she seemed to disappear. Then we saw that Janice had just turned into a little snail. We have a snail! Probably an introject from when we kept a few wild snails as pets some years ago. ... The snail alter is crawling up my pant leg right now. ... (Picks it up and holds it a eye level. Snail gasps and quickly retracts into its shell.) Huh-huh, this should be fun. I'll see if I can get any information out of it.

(Snail comes out, looks angry.)

Put me down!

Sorry. 0.o

- Imre

Day 14

Hi, I'm Shauna!

So ... how do I present myself? Okay, I'll just be factual. Last night, Sydnie came out and saw that her inner body had belly-bulge, as if she were pregnant, and she was. I was 'born' this morning; that is, Sydnie suddenly had a flat belly and a baby in her arms. I went from being an infant to a fully-grown woman in about an hour. I wasn't happy with the rapid development but at least I stopped at adulthood. (I really wanted to spend more time as a child.)

Funny thing: People in our system usualy form as adults and marvel at how that happens. I should be happy that I had a childhood, even if it only lasted about 10 minutes.

So, right, I'm Lyall and Sydnie's daughter. I don't look like either one of them, though, and I'm certainly not a werewolf like my dad. Instead, I look like a creature my mother saw when she was baby-happy. There's a game in the Google apps store where you raise this little devil baby. It has horns, a tail and white hair; I have those features, but I choose not to wear my horns and tail. (I'm enjoying the white hair, though. ) The baby looked so cute that she wanted to download the app, but Dad said "NO!" So, she ended up with a real "devil child" instead. (I'm not disproportionately evil, though. I want to be good. ) I guess Mom's baby fever is cured, now. I know Mom and Dad don't want to go through that again.

Well, that's the beginning of my odd existence. Let's see what happens with me.

Oh, and the snail's name is Jericho.

- Shauna, the birthday girl

Oh, nevermind. I am a werewolf like my dad. Unlike him, though, I prefer my human form and find my wolf form difficult to accept. Dad's a wolf all the time and rarely uses his human shape, and then only briefly. Oddly, he was human in the dream except for one brief moment. Hm.

I'm not a devil anymore, by the way.

- Shauna

In the evening of the 14, a boy came out and took control of the body for a few minutes. He thought/said some things and we saw his face and figure, but we didn't get his name. No idea who that was. We'll see if we can't find out more about him today (16), or else meet someone new.

And happy Easter.

- Shauna

Day what?

Hi. I think I came out at the time Shauna referred to. I also came out last night and someone came up with the name "Rex" then. I am a boy in perhaps my early teens and I have closely-cut red hair and freckles. Personality and emotions seem rather subdued. Don't really care to refer to myself, but using "I" as needed. That's all I can tell for now. 'Bye.

- Rex?

Thanks, Rex, for introducing yourself.

Let's make a list of who we've found by now:

Lucas
Ashton
"Big" Anthony
"Little" Anthony
Clay
Saul
Josh (formerly nameless)
Kayzer
Nasha
Chicago
Tiger
Timmy
Beverly Olive (one person)
James
Lyall
Sydnie
Alijah-fire
Lahmilji
Jericho
Shauna
Rex

21 people and it's only the 17th. Not bad.

Annnd, now I have to change our signature again, this time to say "80+ alters.

Later.

- Imre

Day 19

We found a new one last night. While a couple of our feline alters were out having fun, we senced a canine presense that was neither Lyall nor Shauna (our werewolves). We finally cornered the beast and got it to talk to us (not easily).The dog had no name, sex or particular species, but we ended up figuring out it was a female and landed on the name Erin. After researching canids, she decided the golden jackal fit her best. Erin is very nice and quite happy. She doesn't have a human, furry or anthropoid form, but she can balance on her hind legs to mimic our body when she's out.

- Imre and others