Lost a pound today... quite proud.
I'm not going to post my calorie content as I fear it can be triggering to those recovering from eating disorders. I got quite depressed today, and didn't eat as much which then followed itself with late night anxiety. I'm extremely worried about over-eating, which has caused me to go to the obsessive extreme of calorie counting and I'm severely nervous about falling back into old habits that made me this way.
On the bright side, I finally got my exercise in! 418 calories on the stationary bike burned in about 30 minutes. I plan on finding other activities at my local gym to start here soon.

Today was the Superbowl :-/ Being apart of a mid-western family it is tradition to plan extravagant meals on the day of this event, which kind of broke me.
Breakfast
Multigrain English Muffin - 100 calories
Two Egg Whites - 34 calories
Thin Sliced Colby Jack - 45 calories
Thin Turkey Bacon x2 - 70 calories
1/2 Cup Steel Cut Oats - 150 calories
Total - 399 calories
Overview of the total meal is that Im kinda iffy on the whole thing. I underestimated the calories in the oats and only found out until after I ate them. My goal was to keep my 3 meals at 300, and then leave room for 3 100 calorie snacks. Yikes.
Lunch-
None! Totally unintentional. I had a very busy afternoon of Menards and Kroger, but picked up some nice foods for the rest of the week!
Dinner-
Chicken tacos with lettuce, cheese, beans, rice.. Ugh. Its honestly making me nervous typing that. Im so set on beating my binge eating that im being very careful with my self control, which faltered a bit today. Im sure it all was 2000 cal or less, but tomorrow will be better and healthier!

When I was younger I dealt with a lot of trauma induced by my father and his addictions. Since then, I have undergone many other traumatizing experiences and have developed BPD. As many know, one of the symptoms of BPD is known as impulsive behavior, and I was severely effected with bingeing. Over the years my impulsive behavior has led to a full fledged binge eating disorder. I have struggling with my weight and self image ever since I've been struggling. I have gone from 130 to 210 in 3 years, and I've never felt worse. At this point I have decided I am ready to fight my disoder and overcome my bingeing and lose the weight to finally feel good again.
To track my journey to recovery, I have decided to record my days by listing my meals, snacks, and exercises.