Alright let me start this off with some context, I am a 18 year old senior who's life revolves around animals. At my house I have a cat and 7 reptiles (all mine), but at my grandparents who i vist every weeked, has not just a cat, but a spawn of pure evil. Now this cat we bought from a home as a kitten and raise it up to the evil it is today, it has never been abused and has a life full of enrichment amd everything it needs. But even so this cat does not let anyone pet it, it never purs, it breaks stuff, attacks at random, and has a ever growing desire to murder. My cat at home is the complete oppisite, so needless to say I was taken back by the attitude, and tried many things to correct this behavior. But recently I have had this ever burning passion to strangle the cat, step on its neck, or simply kill it in anyway possible. This started when the cat decided to ######6 fling one of my gecko enlosers across the room, break in, and eat its tail. It must have thought the taste was good too, because now she wont ######6 leave any of my enclosures alone and i have to hide them in the basement. Ever since she touched my precious child, I've felt this way, and I have given up on trying to fix whatever mental problem this cat has, because whenever I see it, I get a visual image in my mind of abusing the thing. This freaks me out, I would never hurt my other animals or even my cat, but this ######6 evil has me going crazy, and these thoughts i have need to stop.

Hello and welcome....

Usually blog entries can be expected to not get much response, you may find more feedback posting in open forum. Maybe Anger Management.

I have OCD. One major theme for me is harm thoughts. Thoughts of killing people and pets. So maybe I can lend a hand.

I think this might bother and weigh on you, because you're an animal lover. I think a lot of people, would ofc not hurt the cat. But they would entertain murderous thoughts, without guilt. Intellectually, I know that as an OCD person, I don't have thoughts worse or different from others, but I obsess over having had them.

You're understandably upset, there is no love lost between you and the cat. A lot of people would fantasize about killing it, without doing it ofc. And not be bothered by the thoughts. But your sensitivity to animals might be making your anger uncomfortable.

As long as these just stay thoughts, no harm done. Thoughts are just thoughts.

Ofc I hope you don't do anything! Cats can be messed up creatures sometimes. And it's very hard to get them to change. I've known (and had) difficult kitties before. Just remember it is a living creature with its own issues and hangups. And ofc it's in many cats nature to go after prey. I've rescued plenty of lizards and mice unlucky enough to get inside, from my little mouser.