Anti-Terrorism Officers in Dawn Raid on Local Author......

More than 120 armed police officers led by members of the Q8 Anti-Terrorism Squad raided the Brimscombe home of reclusive and controversial author Professor Tom Nimington early this morning.

A passing neighbour, vivacious Kylie Thrush (17), told Bitch reporters that Prof. Nimington (93) together with three small men in emerald green overalls and singing with strong irish accents, were driven away in waiting police vans. Prof. Nimington is believed to have close links with dissident IRA faction "The Imaginaries", who first came to public attention with their daring kidnap of contemporary poet Dennis the Rhymer - the P Diddy of Beetroots. They are believed by intelligence sources to be on active service in the Cotswold area, and are notorious for their capricious behaviour, wild parties, and unbelievable shoe repairs.

Clive Horsley (93), solicitor acting for Prof. Nimington, told waiting reporters: "This is a bloody farce. It's a blatant and unprovoked attack on Fairyland".

A police spokesperson later denied that an active service unit of dissident fairies was being held under the Prevention of Terrorism Act, only that Prof. Nimington and three small gentlemen were helping them with their enquiries.

Volund, the King of Elfland, was unavailable for comment, although a palace official did hint, off the record, that such a serious incident could lead to reprisals, and provoke "difficulties".

Chief Superintendent Sir Ken Tyre (93), head of Q8, is still believed to be missing.