Lay in bed and read for the morning, waiting for the ptsd to pass. I have pulled back from my normal interactions this week. Weekend with the boy but I might swap it so he comes to a party with me next Saturday night. He really enjoys that crowd. I have meditation on Sunday night if I want to go along to it. And there is a walk I can do with my walking group on Monday, if I want to do that. My usual state of overwhelm just kicking along; I'd like to be able to turn the dial back on my emotions a bit. I suppose that is what the meds are for. They make it manageable. Finding that place to accept whatever life throws at us; can be a lot like trying to find the Holy Grail. I've got a book out of the library called Buddha's Brain. It seems to have a lot about neuroplasticity - and I find neuroplasticity a source of hopefulness; even though I haven't yet been able to make a discernible impact from all that I do to try and change my neural pathways I think acceptance that my brain is ###$ might be just as useful as trying to fix it or manage it's malfunctions. Well the book will give me something to distract myself during my time out in "safe harbour". Jade.