If anybody notices me reply-bombing/obsessively responding to anything I think I feel I COULD reasonably respond to, I apologize.

I'm having some anxiety issues. one coping method is to obsessively fixate on something that seems to be helping; I'm not controlling that impulse particularly well at the moment. To be honest, I'm all out of whack because I finally worked up the courage to call the T and schedule things and write out this long email giving the basics of our situation and... and I'm drained.

I NEEDED to get it out to feel safe going to see her, but it was absolutely heart-wrenchingly nerve-wracking to call her up, talk to her, and ask for her email address. We had to write out the whole damned thing while it was still close to the surface, before everything slid back out of "actually remembering" into the "Remembering only the basic tale without feeling anything or actually going back and REMEMBERING.

But I did it, and I'm proud of those in here who were brave enough to let us do what we needed to do, even though they were afraid and very much against it. I will be buying them something nice.

But the other problem is that I'm also lonely. Nobody I feel like talking to is online. I want some interaction, damnit! D<