I havent been on here as much as I've been busy with school and whatnot.. I think I missed a friend. Hopefully we can find each other again, I seem to have been late with replying to a message saying he wasnt going to be on here much anymore.

I don't think I'll be on here as much anymore either, but I'll try and keep occasionally checking my messages on here just in case someone wants to contact me..

So if you send me a message, rest assured EVENTUALLY I will get to it.

Cheers.

Holy $#%^. So if you guys don't already know I have a bit of an obsession with learning about things I don't understand, a lot of this involving psychology or criminology. I'm interested in watching interviews with criminals and non-criminals with interesting minds.

Well, I just watched an australian 60 minutes show about one of the most surprising criminals I've seen yet, and the details about him and whatnot and boy was I angry at the reporter interviewing him.

She got almost no info out of him, understandably, because she was being a bitch the ENTIRE TIME. Literally tossing in insults and forcefully asking her questions, letting her anger at what he'd done get the best of her. Now naturally the stuff this guy has done would make people angry. I get that. But she was a reporter, and an interviewer, and in those cases you are supposed to keep your damn cool and get the information.

Honestly I don't care who it is you're interviewing if you're a professional, keep your emotions to yourself. If you're not giving the person any respect, why do you expect to have your questions answered?

This is absolutely infuriating for someone like me with an interest in what criminals have to say, about themselves, the crime, what they think contributed to that..etc. Not just the typical "and how do you FEEL ABOUT WHAT YOUVE DONE" more questions about what went through their mind, how their childhood was, did they have any thoughts about x before y? etc.

I wanted more information but I haven't gotten it thanks to reporters being DUMB. Apparently the guy is writing a journal with some of the information in it, but its been 2 years since his arrest and I haven't heard anything...I blame the reporter. -pout face-

I miss someone I just fricking met. I am very confused and find myself thinking of them a lot. Not in a weird way just "I hope they're okay, I wonder what they're up to, they havent been on in a few days"

someday I'll figure out why I get attached to people so easily (platonically) but today is not that day

I realized something, especially after talking to my mom openly about my thoughts regarding some of the things I talk about on this forum.

I've always been a pretty surprisingly open minded person. As in, I'll listen to anyone's point of view no matter how opposite mine it is. Doesn't mean I'll agree, but I'll listen and most always try my hardest not to immediately shut it out of my mind if I don't agree.

I've listened to people vent to me about practically everything, from politics to dangerous thoughts to strange kinks. People have told me many times that I surprised them with how accepting I could be, and how much I try and empathize with people and understand where they're coming from.

Still, I'm not perfect. I get offended from time to time about certain things, but I'm open with that too. I realize in certain areas I have a bias and I'll let the person know that, but continue letting them talk. It's a good learning experience for me.

I want to be that kind of person that people can just talk to and not be afraid of making me mad, or weirding me out. I want to try really hard to not judge people without knowing them first, because everyone has a story. I know what it feels like to have your thoughts shut down immediately after trying to voice them and I don't want other people to go through that.

I swear nothing is more frustrating in the world than being on your manic phase and not understanding something in school. For credits reasons, I'm still doing classes despite my age. I do them online though.

Due to my learning disabilities I have huge problems with things like Math, I NEED people to go through things with me. Doesn't matter how many resources you give me or examples or readings, I can read the resources over and over and not get it. I require someone to go through the thing I am stuck on with me.

But because I'm in online school this is hard. Every time I'm manic and stuck on something (like today) I end up in frustrated tears and I want to just chuck things at the wall. I break down and I can't calm down because being manic feels like your entire body is full of constant electricity, I literally cannot calm down even if I want to, and I want to so badly. The emotions build up inside me to the point where it feels like I'll explode and unfortunately this stupid school doesn't understand that people with learning disabilities (they don't know about my bipolar because I doubt they'd give a $#%^ even if I told them, not a ton of people in the educational field without bipolar disorder really understand how it impacts learning) GO TO THEIR SCHOOL.

I HATE that I'm like this, I hate how no matter how old I get I still have difficulties, and I hate that it gets so overwhelming that I straight up start crying in anger. I'm aware that in these temper tantrums I look like a child, crossing my arms in tears yelling, but my brain will not move forward until something gives and I get help.

Bipolar disorder and ADD+Aspergers is one of the most frustrating combinations ever x__x