I haven't posted in foreverrrr and I'm sorry. I got a job in June so that took up a lot of my time and focus. At first I was sooo wary of being around males but I reached out to a struggling friend there who happened to be male and it felt really wonderful to be able to make physical contact again without freaking out. I suppose I was overly relieved because our relationship quickly turned sexual and I was perfectly fine during our encounters. Shortly after that, probably a coincidence of timing, I awoke one morning from a hideous migraine feeling like the weight of the world was off my shoulders and life was good again. I was once again a normal, fully-functioning person. Well, as normal as anyone can be. Even my bitter, angry moods were gone except for those days that are just frustrating in and of themselves of course. But the past week or so the depression is creeping back in, I'm thinking about the winter coming up and trying to combat being unemployed for the next several months. But I'll pull through like I have the past few winters. I'm actually hoping to meet someone and get married and have children but I'm still the shy person I always was and I don't even know where to meet someone in the first place.
As for the perpetrator, I checked his facebook on a whim and he's been living in the same town as me and I haven't run into him which is great, I just hope this continues because I've been having a lot of revenge fantasies about possible run-ins and they don't end well.
So basically I'm okay and facing normal fears about the future.