i have been defeated

A real life Shinji wrote:

Peptron wrote:

Jessica's Hope wrote:And i have some meds - i just started wellbutrin.

Wellbutrin to an avoidant? I have been put on Wellbutrin myself to try to fight schizoid PD & depression and it made me nervous, anxious and agitated, as well as insomniac. I have been on it for 6 weeks now and the side effects are starting to subside. Bad side is that I am going back to my lethargic self again... though the kick it gave was rather strong and quite... uncomfortable.

Do you think the meds were partially responsible for your existential depression who mentioned recently? I've heard some anti-depressants were taken off the market as people had killed themselves due to the effects. Thats why I'm so sceptical in regards to meds'.

I'm meeting my family's doctor tomorrow about that. I somewhat want to get off those meds but at the same time I am afraid of what would become of me. Wellbutrin is used to fight apathy and anhedonia, and it's exactly with what I am struggling most lately. Anyway I want to get better. I've been followed by a psychotherapist for about 2 months now, but I believe I will need something more potent than that... I seem to know more than he does and he agrees with me way too much for my tastes.

A real life Shinji wrote: I've heard some anti-depressants were taken off the market as people had killed themselves due to the effects. Thats why I'm so sceptical in regards to meds'.

I always found that a strange claim - I mean most of these meds are for depression and related illnesses, so chances are they were feeling suicidal before they started the meds.

But, i don't think most doctors fully understand how these meds affect people. i doubt that pharma companies even know. they all claim that they are failry safe, but no-one has long-term data to support that claim.

Jessica's Hope wrote:

A real life Shinji wrote: I've heard some anti-depressants were taken off the market as people had killed themselves due to the effects. Thats why I'm so sceptical in regards to meds'.

I always found that a strange claim - I mean most of these meds are for depression and related illnesses, so chances are they were feeling suicidal before they started the meds.

I can see that happening with something like Wellbutrin. For example some forms of depression (like the one I have) involves lack of clarity of thoughts and difficulty to concentrate. So even if you are suicidal, you cannot really think clearly enough to come up with something concrete. But in some contexts the attention deficit can get solved before the depressive feelings, so you are still depressed but now can think clearly, so you can get very clear images in your mind about how to end yourself.

-

Peptron wrote:I can see that happening with something like Wellbutrin. For example some forms of depression (like the one I have) involves lack of clarity of thoughts and difficulty to concentrate. So even if you are suicidal, you cannot really think clearly enough to come up with something concrete. But in some contexts the attention deficit can get solved before the depressive feelings, so you are still depressed but now can think clearly, so you can get very clear images in your mind about how to end yourself.

I had never really thought of that before. That is a good point. Coming from my perspective (a more OCD slant) suicide has always been a "logical" solution to problems that get stuck in a cycle in my head. I think things over and over and the only solution is suicide. Meds usually slow my brain down so i dont seem to get stuck in that circular logic as often.

It takes a while for the drugs to work - if they're going to at all. The side effects seem to kick in right away though.

Yes!! - The Inquisitor!! He was cool. I liked the way they outsmarted him. I wish I could be a space bum like Lister.

I'm not much for the pills myself >_> I kinda picked that up from my grandma. The only way I've gotten through TEH DOWNZ is by getting myself caught up in work. Of course, the weekends are hardest for me (Tuesday and Wednesday nights). I just sit here at my computer, staring, and I can't stop thinking. I start thinking about who I am, how much of a failure I am, and whatnot. I try to do things to stop thinking, but... yeah, sometimes you can't avoid it.

Try to get caught up in something. Besides that... I dunno how to help you

Do you mean a new series of... ... ...what was it called again? - Red Dwarf? If they do bring out a new series, it will look completely different because the old one was cheap and tacky. Plus, Craig Charles is now acting in Eastenders!

Admittedly, I never like Red Dwarf, nor did I like Star Trek: The Original Series. The Next Generation was by far my favourite, but I also watched Quantum Leap religiously. I met Dean Stockwell once actually - He played 'Al' in Quantum Leap.

Give me some links to these science & history documentaries, will you?