How are you today thread (trigger warning)

I feel like... too girly. I wish I have my own girl body. Hehe.

I'm thinking about getting into MMA in a few months or so. The problem is, I'm not sure everyone would like it. I think that's the big problem, I find it hard to enjoy things I think i would enjoy because there's always someone who doesn't agree. I don't feel like we're very separated from each other, so if they don't like it, it feels like *I* suddenly don't like it anymore. I hate starting things and suddenly not wanting to do it anymore. I WANT to do this! Maybe I just need to work on separating my feelings from the others' Stop letting the others influence my behavior and just do what *I* want!
Seems so egoistic though, and I'm sure it's not gonna be as easy as I hope it is. But damn it, I want to do something and go through with it, I want to do it because it's MY thing!

reasonably or at least temporarily whole.

confused_girly wrote:I'm thinking about getting into MMA in a few months or so. The problem is, I'm not sure everyone would like it. I think that's the big problem, I find it hard to enjoy things I think i would enjoy because there's always someone who doesn't agree. I don't feel like we're very separated from each other, so if they don't like it, it feels like *I* suddenly don't like it anymore. I hate starting things and suddenly not wanting to do it anymore. I WANT to do this! Maybe I just need to work on separating my feelings from the others' Stop letting the others influence my behavior and just do what *I* want!

When it comes to dissociative fragmentation and DID that kind of thing is a real pain in the arse. One alter wants to do something, the other feels utterly miserable about it, and vice versa - if you're lucky enough to have 2 alters who are completely opposing in some senses e.g. socially.

I know someone who's been having a problem with one alter wants to go do something like that, the other can't stand being around other human beings. Same with everything else one wants to do... since people are everywhere. Stupid creatures, lol.

You can separate your feelings from alters' feelings but you can't stop them existing or stopping you from doing things, except through integration (or through agreeing to have completely separate lives and take turns etc. but if you have DDNOS-1 its almost as if you're one step closer to integration than a person who already has separate lives for different alters, so it doesn't make too much sense, and if you're co-conscious its just going to mess with your head [piss you off even more].)

Not being co-conscious at the time can work when you're in the right stage of things, but there will be times/stages where that just won't work either. The good news is that being livid about it can give way to progress if you treat it the right way.

It's the first time I've been in the body since my integration with Rorge. It feels like everything has changed now. Well, everything has changed Inside for some reason, but it's more than just that. I can... feel. It's like something's been unlocked and I care about people and things. Color has flooded my world, but losing him makes me feel so heavy with sadness. Before, I don't know if I could have felt so much grief. -Thalyssa

I am feeling mad, scared and lonely. I'm so new to this forum i'm worried I will say something wrong and nobody will trust me. I've had a really bad day so I probably shouldn't be posting anyway. But I do hope to build trust and be able to provide support as well.

bevia wrote:I am feeling mad, scared and lonely. I'm so new to this forum i'm worried I will say something wrong and nobody will trust me. I've had a really bad day so I probably shouldn't be posting anyway. But I do hope to build trust and be able to provide support as well.

hope your day gets better and welcome to forums. We were scared to stay the 'wrong' thing here too, but it's actually pretty hard to do.
Feel free to PM us if you want to talk.

tbh, Been feeling frustrated, which has been making me miserable.

really struggling don't know what to do. scared to contact crisis team; they've never been very helpful and get thrown around person to person. don't know what to do feel so bad the house is a mess and can hardly get out of bed.

I am feeling mad, scared and lonely. I'm so new to this forum i'm worried I will say something wrong and nobody will trust me. I've had a really bad day so I probably shouldn't be posting anyway. But I do hope to build trust and be able to provide support as well.

I hope you're feeling better and I just wanted to say welcome here and I'm glad to see you

really struggling don't know what to do. scared to contact crisis team; they've never been very helpful and get thrown around person to person. don't know what to do feel so bad the house is a mess and can hardly get out of bed.

Is there anyone you can contact? A friend? A crisis hotline? Someone you can talk to and who can give you some support? I'm sorry you're feeling so low. Thinking of you.

mixed.