does annyone really get it?

i'm not real but i can fake it
i can faked it good and long
so long that it being fake this good
is not within the realm of possibility
i sometimes say
as long as you don't think of me as a human being
and as long as you don't don't underestimate me
i am harmess

how's that for you does annyone get it?

-- Sun Nov 25, 2012 7:47 am --

smartest reply ever made to me saying i'm s sociopath
was by a aspie: so you have a high social skill

I don't know, sometimes I think I almost get you, though I can't quite figure out what the whole sociopathy story is all about. You sound like a simple person.

but does annyone get you?
really get you?

sometimes i don't even get myself! so, does it really matter?

shock_the_monkey wrote:sometimes i don't even get myself!

Yeah, same here.

so, does it really matter?

I think it does. I think everybody wants to find someone who "gets them", or maybe "one of their own kind". Some people just give up. Not that I judge them. It's part of social existence to suppress some of your nature.

anagram wrote:

shock_the_monkey wrote:so, does it really matter?

I think it does. I think everybody wants to find someone who "gets them", or maybe "one of their own kind". Some people just give up. Not that I judge them. It's part of social existence to suppress some of your nature.

i know what you're saying. but i think in time one ends up looking beyond the need for this kind of social acceptance and approval. especially if one never really finds it. i just think that we never really know ourselves and we never really know anyone else either. so, the whole idea of someone else completely understanding one is just completely flawed from the get go. it's just that we like to try to delude ourselves into thinking that at least someone else understands us. and the let down when we find we were wrong all along can be quite devastating too. hence my, "so, does it really matter?". and i guess it does if and only if we think it does. to me, the best thing is not to think this way to start with. but perhaps i'm being too pessimistic and fatalistic about this. it's difficult to shake off a life-times experience of having the other people in one's life turn out to be largely meaningless. it's been about three years since i got sacked from my job and a few months ago i telephoned someone i knew well in that roll. they said to me "you haven't been forgotten". but the truth is that i have. very much so. i don't hear from any of the people i once knew unless i make the effort to contact them. and i knew many of them for nearly the entire time i worked there. nearly 20 years. so, i've given up bothering now. there's a fair bit too much self-disclosure here. but i think you'll at least be able to appreciate where i'm coming from.

PS: nice avatar, BTW.

Nicely explained. So, does it really matter? I guess it doesn't.

shock_the_monkey wrote:PS: nice avatar, BTW.

Thanks! It's from [this video] (one of my favorites). I love the imagery.

shock_the_monkey wrote:i don't hear from any of the people i once knew unless i make the effort to contact them.

I ... hate this. Not your comment, just that this is really true...it relates to me a lot.

I quit a job I was at for 4 years about 2 years ago, and very few from that position ever try to keep in contact with me. One of them was a friend for about a year and some after I quit...we used to go to lunch every so often, and then we stopped, kinda suddenly. It was shortly after mentioning my diagnosis of Aspergers (not sure that had anything to do with it or not). The other is my old boss from there, we still sometimes go out for lunch...but it's rare.

What's consistent among those I even meet now is that it's generally always me who has to initiate the contact to do something. There's pretty much very few to no times when someone contacted me and said "hey, lets go do lunch" or even just "hey".

This used to cause me a lot of stress..but not really any more. It's something I should have expected..because I remember leaving one of my high schools, where I got along with some people really well (by far better than in other times) and didn't have any communication extended from their end. Sadly, the same goes for family even now. I had one family member actually say "hey, you never visit" and in the back of my head I thought "well, you never invited me..."

keeping in contact with people is hard...that's one thing I'm glad for Facebook..it helps with some of that a bit.

shock_the_monkey wrote: but i think in time one ends up looking beyond the need for this kind of social acceptance and approval. especially if one never really finds it. i just think that we never really know ourselves and we never really know anyone else either. so, the whole idea of someone else completely understanding one is just completely flawed from the get go. it's just that we like to try to delude ourselves into thinking that at least someone else understands us. and the let down when we find we were wrong all along can be quite devastating too.

I agree with this all except for the part about it necessarily being devastating. Why must it be? We are not Borg after all, and I wouldn't want to be!
I have actually have a theory, that if any given person (NT or AS or otherwise) were to suddenly find themselves actually in the mind of another person, they would probably go instantly insane. Because every person thinks quite differently from everyone else. Sure there are categories, and generalized tendencies, but no two are alike. That's why no person could ever really get another person. My husband "gets" some things about me, but not all things, and vice versa. It can be frustrating, but I have come the conclusion that the alternative (i.e. the ramifications of truly understanding another person fully) would be the more devastating option.

I'm not sure what all this has to with people not keeping in touch, or not being able to be quite close in spite of this relative lack of full understanding. I have a couple of friends who are very different from me, indeed if they could see into my mind they'd probably freak out LOL, but we're still close friends.

slugger wrote:I agree with this all except for the part about it necessarily being devastating. Why must it be? We are not Borg after all, and I wouldn't want to be!

i think it's the being human that hurts. no one (at least no one that's sane) willingly lets themself be hurt. it's only natural to close one's self off from the causes of such experiences.