Pretending to be watched

Since primary school I have always pretended people are watching me go about my daily life. Like a big brother type thing. In primary school I would imagine a group of select school mates were watching my home life. This continued through secondary school. It would be other students or teachers watching my life. When I started working this continued with work collegues. I am now in my forties and still pretend certain work collegues are watching me after work and on the weekends. I also pretend my husband is watching me at work. When I first took anti depressants years ago, I stopped this for a short while, but soon started it agAin.

I know it's not real, it's like a harmless game. I have never told anyone this, not even my psychiatrist or counsellor. Does anyone else do this sort of thing or have any theories on why I might do it? Is it some form of attention seeking?

Hi there

I am 32 year old paranoid schizophrenic with a bipolar type mood disorders. I have always had the fixation that I am being observed everywhere and at times this has triggered full blown psychotic episodes, I still have little flashes of it even on the medication.
It sounds to me that you have an obsessive compulsion as your insight into the fact it is not real means it is unlikely to be psychotic, plus I know that some antidepressants actually treat OCD which maybe why you stopped for a while when you started the antidepressants. Keep an eye on it of course and good luc.

Lilyjj wrote: Does anyone else do this sort of thing or have any theories on why I might do it? Is it some form of attention seeking?

I actually used to do this a lot at as a kid. I would pretend that certain kids from my school were watching me "big brother" style whenever I wasn't at school. It's actually pretty harmless and no, it doens't mean you are an attention seeker. I think you're just a person who doesn't mind sharing their most personal moments with the rest of the world.