help :(

Thanks masq for the input i havent had internet for a couple days because of some bad storms that rolled through here. I'm still up in the air wondering wth? with her i got drunk tonight trying to keep myself calm i just wanna go break something right now, or break myself against something i cant figure for the life of me why seomone would want to throw away something from my sight is a great thing again i wonder if i m suffering from mental problems myself :9

This is a common reaction after all the confusion you have gone through. You sound as if you're going through a lot of anger right now, and this can be scary if you have no outlet for your anger. Physical exercise can help you rid your body of all the stress chemicals and adrenaline that is building up.

Speaking about your thoughts and feelings to a counsellor can help you to gain a sense of perspective. In time, these feelings will lessen, and you will find a way forward, but you will need to work through all the emotions first. They're painful, confusing and all consuming at the moment, and you sound as if you feel swamped by them. If this is the case, please find an outlet for them, ie physical exercise.

Thank you again masq for the replies .I've finally giving up i seen her monday which made me very happy talked to here a couple times here and there throughout the week,found out shes at least trying some mood stablizers,friday came i was hoping to just hang out and talk that night got the cold shoulder pretty quick called and her mom said she was busy and she would have her call me back 30 to 45 mins later well hour and 15 go by ...i end up driving past her house i was drunk from being anxieious i guess nervious if she would really talk to me didnt know it but her dad seen me go by so when i called the next day thats what i heard why am i driving by late at night...yeah i known as soon as i drove by i shouldnt have,i cant help it we got into a fight because i asked if she was seeing anybody claims she has seen somebody here and there nothing serious after she blew up feeling like i was prying into her private life... im making myself hate her because thats the only way im going to break this obsession, she replied after she blew up at me in an email about calling me back after she blew up cause she thought i was giving her crap,but i told her no more calling no more driving by no more nothing unless its something she wanted that im going to get out of the house and meet other woman instead of of sitting here waiting sorry i guess being anyomous and talking to people help, i cant keep living like this my mantra anymore is she left me and she doesnt care about me anymore shes nothing but a lost little whore to me anymore seems like all i run into are women being that way... im tired of it this will either make me or break me

i got a sensation i probably won't be so empathic to anyone any longer,it has modified one of my primary vaules in my thoughts, if everyone else wants to rest around what is so incorrect if i do? Believed i study somewhere that 80% of connections there is being disloyal going on.

I'm sorry but what?