My HPD saga gets increasingly interesting

A couple of weeks ago when I wrote the "Feigning Naivete..." thread I was kind of angry with my HPD friend, and I apologize to any of the HPD's who may have been offended by my last post in that thread.
Now I've evolved into somewhat of a casual observer of her; I don't seek her out as much as I used to, but if I don't hear from her for a couple of days I'll just send her a quick "Hi" to rattle her cage and get her started on communicating with me again. It never fails; it's like turning a faucet on. One really good thing is that I have evolved from anger to finding humor in her actions, because I know her better than she knows herself apparently.
The way I do this is to view every word and every action from her as an attempt at scoring attention or supply. It's a cynical way of viewing things, but they make complete sense now.
For example, last night she came to my sons' baseball games, and while sitting by me texted with a few guys, which is normal for her. She also has the most obnoxious alert tone every time she gets a text, and makes sure it is nice and loud for everyone around to hear. I get this stuff now. Another thing she did was a few times I watched her put her phone down in a place where her last text would be clear for me to see, and out of the corner of my eye I saw her taking quick looks at me to see if I was looking at her phone.
Before knowing about HPD's I would have been a jealous wreck, and would have probably tried to look at her texts, asked her "who keeps texting you?" or something stupid like that. Anyway, I never gave her the satisfaction of looking at her phone, so she pulls something else out of her bag of tricks. She shows me her phone and says "this obnoxious guy who is going to be in training with me tomorrow is trying to hit on me, hehe. He asked for my cell number for professional reasons and now won't stop texting me. What should I do?" I just kind of gave a small chuckle, shrugged my shoulders, and got back to watching the game.
This morning I come to work and get on Facebook, and it now says she is "In a Relationship". This chick has been single, relationship-wise, for about a year, and before we had our time apart she said she knew it would kill me if she ever got into a relationship with a guy, and back then it would have devastated me. This time I find it kind of hilarious, because just two weeks ago we were having rough, nasty sex, and she had been "talking" to this guy at least 6 weeks prior. I mean, I know we will have sex again because she will get bored with this poor sap, and I'll be just two doors down to say "You're not being bad; it's his fault for not being with you right now." He's a nice guy who she will be able to control, and he has no clue what's coming.
The way she thinks really fascinates me though. In addition to trying to get my attention last night, was her ulterior motive drawing me in emotionally so it would "devastate" me when I saw her new relationship status this morning? In her own way is she possibly punishing me for not giving a damn, or punishing me for the rough stuff we did? Why would she go to such great lengths to get jealous reactions out of me? The best part: I "Liked" her new relationship status on Facebook, and sent her a text saying "Be Safe Today " because she is taking safety training.
I bet her fan club members are on suicide watch. This stuff is far more entertaining than any mystery or suspense novel I have ever read, and I am having so much fun seeing what her next move will be. I think she is making me more of a bad boy than I already was.
What do you guys think about all of this? It is getting to the point where she is turning into one of those people that I laugh at as soon as I see them, kind of like a comedian.

wt* dude why would you even post this on an HPD forum? i don't understand what you were even looking for in posting this.

- Labor.

Moving this to the Relationship Forum at NowIGetit's request.

thisislabor wrote:wt* dude why would you even post this on an HPD forum? i don't understand what you were even looking for in posting this.

- Labor.

I'm sorry Labor. I re-read the OP earlier, before your post, and asked Masquerade to move it to the Relationship forum because I thought it may have been insensitive to HPD's. My purpose was to get the questions near the end of the OP answered, and to give proper context to the situation. Again, I apologize for my insensitivity.

NowIGetIt -

My rough answer to your question is this:

First, let's take a look at aggression in general. I don't mean defending yourself, I mean aggressive behavior. What's the point? Well my take is there are two basic ways to boost our own ego. One way is to raise ours, and another way is to lower others. Aggression is a means to an ends to the second way. Power over someone is a way for some to make themselves feel stronger.

So there three common forms of aggression, they include overt, passive, and covert. Passive and covert are somewhat alike in that the aggressor can deny responsibility for doing anything wrong. It's a great way to be aggressive from the point of view of the aggressor, who can also convince themselves they didn't do anything wrong, and so need to feel guilt, while still obtaining their goal, an ego boost via using power they have over someone weaker to make themselves feel stronger.

If you look at it like that, both the attention seeking (i.e., validation from others that one is desirable, needed, enjoyable, etc.), and the jealousy games have a common motivator. Mechanisms to try and build self-esteem.

And that's really the way I look at it now. As someone whose self-esteem is in the toilet and is desperately trying whatever seems to work to build it up. Unfortunately it's just a temporary band-aid since the real self-esteems issues are not addressed.

That written, it's not really good for you to benefit from her games either. In the end you'll likely just end up feeling like crap about yourself too for not taking the high road here. Just a thought.

wow I envy her,

For what yyy?

Truly powerful people never have to hurt others to make themselves feel stronger.

The person who has to yell out I crushed this person or that is waving a flag of weakness and cowardice.

Really strong people don't need to hurt others to feel strong.

Just the truth... every desperate attempt is just another sign of a weak person who can't cope with life without stooping lower then hurting a person who actually could have loved.

It's honor-less.. like crushing a kitten and that makes who stronger really?

YYY, I don't see why you envy her. She has told me repeatedly that she doesn't think she looks good and anyone who tells her she looks pretty is lying to her. She has also developed a small beer gut and probably only gets around 4 hours of sleep a night. She drinks 2 pots of coffee a day and smokes a pack and a half every day. She is exhausted most of the time during the day at work.
Her latest life change is going to be kind of entertaining, but actually informative, for myself and a couple of buddies that I have explained HPD to. It is tragic at the same time. A big part of me wants to warn this guy that she is with, but another part of me knows damn well that he would just turn on me and she would make me out to be a "stalker who just couldn't let go" so I'm going to let him find out the hard way. Her 9 year old son is going to have another man in and out of his life, for how long who knows?
What is to envy?

EVERYTHING O.O
what is NOT TO ENVY?

NowIGetIt wrote:YYY, I don't see why you envy her. She has told me repeatedly that she doesn't think she looks good and anyone who tells her she looks pretty is lying to her. She has also developed a small beer gut and probably only gets around 4 hours of sleep a night. She drinks 2 pots of coffee a day and smokes a pack and a half every day. She is exhausted most of the time during the day at work.
Her latest life change is going to be kind of entertaining, but actually informative, for myself and a couple of buddies that I have explained HPD to. It is tragic at the same time. A big part of me wants to warn this guy that she is with, but another part of me knows damn well that he would just turn on me and she would make me out to be a "stalker who just couldn't let go" so I'm going to let him find out the hard way. Her 9 year old son is going to have another man in and out of his life, for how long who knows?
What is to envy?

there is no one who tells me i look pretty not even as a lie,
also i sleep too much(there is nothing to do other than that) that i am always swollen,
she has many guys in her life
but i can't date any guy! i hate guys.

she has a 9 year old son, i want a son too, she is blessed!
i want to drink 2 pots of coffee and smoke too
it looks cool! but i am too lazy to do that.

If she knows how I look
she will tell god 'thank you!' thousands times for not making her looking like me.
i am SERIOUS
this is not HPD low esteem talk.
REALLY.