My gf and I have been together for 7 months now and it's been rocky (cf. previous posts in this forum). We're both women. I am lesbian and she is bisexual. I have low self esteem and fear she'd rather want to be with, practically anyone else, which has triggered some storm at times. I get scared at times and I recently I realised what I think might be the problem (besides my low self esteem): we have very different interests. I am the geeky kind who reads a lot, likes to discuss politics and most often is caught up with some puzzle and am thus not always very aware of what goes on around me. I find her very attractive, funny and smart and I am very eager to be present when we're together. My gf IS very attractive and outgoing. She is also very interested in people, she always comments on people on TV, the ones we pass on the street saying "wow, she's hot", "he has a nice ass", "look at her tits, I wanna to touch them".
When we met she had just come out of a long relationship with a man whom she cheated on with a LOT of people, and to me it seems she has done that to most she's been with. This does not ease my worries. But I guess the issue for now is this: whenever she mentions a friend, an aquaintance of hers or someone from work to me, she always (ALWAYS!) accompanies it with some comment about how they've expressed sexual interest in her or how she used to flirt with them, whether they're someone she's slept with or just someone she finds attractive. The more I think about it, the more it frightens me and hurts me. The other night I confronted her with this "behavioural pattern" of hers and she said it might just be her way of making herself interesting. I told her that instead of making her interesting to me, it made me feel threatened since it seems the only thing all her relationships are about is sexual tension. I can feel it really makes me angry that she is so focused on this. She suggested she'd stop telling me when she's going out with someone she used to flirt with or date, but I don't think that's a solution either. I want to trust her, I only wished she'd stop focusing so much on this, according to her, apparent sex appeal she has on everyone.
I really want to come up with a solution which suits us both, yet for now I feel she's manipulating me because she says and does all these things and they make me not trust her and then she can just call me jealous afterwards. What do you think? I'm rather confused about this, but would like an honest and objective opinion. Thank you.