Significant Other is having Issues

I am extremely concerned and new to this forum....

My fiancee has been extremely codependent and I have been trying to be independent of him and go on with my business even when he pulls theatrical tantrums for attention. During the holidays I picked him up off a railroad track and he voluntarily committed himself to psych help for 5 days, When he returned he spoke about coping skills etc. and I was hopeful...now 2 weeks later, he is pacing the floors, blaming everyone for his lack of finances and career and mad at the world. He is not sleeping or eating well, picks on everything from his recent 10 pound weight gain to his lack of decent pay and keeps us up all hours talking about the "relationship". He asks me if we are still even friends because friends talk. Right now every conversation we have is how he is pissed at the world for losing his job and can't stand not doing anything right etc. I have tried to be quiet, listen, support and only give positive advice but COME ON !!! He is driving me insane and has expressed obsessive calling to my phone like 16 times every 2-3 hours. My sitution is that I am a school teacher with a young child and when we met him he seemed happy and loving. Now all he does is mope and groan and I understand if it was just that, but today he was driving very immaturely on the road to show me how upset he was for having to go to a job paying min wage and did so by driving in and out of the lane and tore around a corner screeching his brakes. I was headed to my moms to visit and so I took another route to get out of his way. He is extremely scary right now and I am just not sure what to do. I love him but I cannot handle this much longer?? Also he talks about how he doesn't want me talking to my parents because they don't respect him since he was committed. My parents DONT respect him for leaving us in the situation financially to handle it on our own but at the same time they are just concerned that he isn't stable enough to pull his own weight. All this aside, I am concerned because he seems weird and crazy to me and I don't get peace or happiness being with him. He is very loving one moment and scary and upset the next. He sometimes will push me with comments till I snap and fuss back and then argues with anything I say. I feel like I am going to lose it if he doesn't chill out....I am so worried what do I do???

If it was me I'd tell him that he needs to get his act together and stop taking his problems out on you. If you can't communicate that much to him, then maybe getting married to him is a bad idea. And if he reacts badly or doesn't change his behaviour at all, maybe you should think twice. People need an ultimatum to change their behaviour. And you need a mature man.
Murderface

I am at moms again with the little one to escape another heckling barrage of harassment. I feel like an idiot, I thought things would get better but he tries to guilt me into giving him money, attention and says things like: " i guess were not a team," then tells me I need counseling to show more love despite the fact that he is completely selfish and doesn't have the ability to help out financially because of the job he took which pays min wage. It is frustrating and i feel alone yet i try to make the best of it. Now i an at a. Point where I am physically exhausted and cant sleep enough to be alert. I feel frustrated about it and want resolution. I am waiting on my taxes to find a good option to move out but i have a feeling i will need a restraining order to keep him away... This is so scary...

I'm with murferface (hi btw, hope you're doing well), although if it were me, I'd sit him down and tell him how I feel. STOP being positive towards him, he won't hear you while ever he is angry. You need to ask yourself two questions:

1. Do you love him?
2. What evidence do you have that shows he is mature under normal circumstances?

I think that while ever you keep being positive, he'll keep blaming. His head space isn't interested in positivity. He'll read it all negatively, thus thinking you don't actually care. My prediction is that he'll see it as "I'm o.k, you're NOT o.k". He's playing victim, and engaging in the victim, persecutor, rescuer triangle. One minute he is the victim, and wants you to be the rescuer, then he becomes the persecutor blaming you, but it seems like he is avoiding being the rescuer. He clearly WANTS to be a victim.

I'd seek some professional help first, then sit him down and tell him how YOU feel. Let him make a choice, either value you and work towards happiness, or continue playing victim and loose you. He has a choice.

Good luck.