Bipolar girlfriend just broke up with me

Hi guys,

So I've been dating this girl for a week (I know, not that long), but I really like her. She makes me happy, she's funny, she's beautiful, she has a job, lives nearby, loves videogames too...all of this good stuff. She's told me I'm a really great boyfriend, her mom says I'm the best guy she's dated by far, she says I make her happy and she likes being with me. She says she thinks I'm cute too.


When I asked her out, though, she told me she's bipolar and that's pushed a lot of people away from her in the past but not to take any meltdowns personally.


So during the week (and keep in mind she's also on her period this week) she kept leading me on saying how much she liked me and that we should road trip to her cousins and hang out on labor day, etc. I'm basically feeling great. Yesterday we go on a double date with her friends and everything goes well until we go back to her place and she goes to get the SNES with her friend matt. I notice its taking a long time so I go up to help and her doors closed. I walk in and shes lying on the bed listening to really depressing music and her friend is trying to make her feel better but basically nothing I do is helping her. I go downstairs to play games with her brother and friends despite feeling pretty awkward and useless, and after a while she comes down and plays left 4 dead with us for a bit. I try holding her hand and putting my arm around her but she pushes me away saying she feels claustrophobic and just needs to breathe for a while. Then after playing for a while she gets a text and goes back upstairs for a while leaving me with her brother and friend Hutch to play games and she sends me a text from upstairs saying she needs some space and that she wants to be alone in her room away from everyone for the night but it was nothing i did so don't take it personally.


So I go home and text her saying I made it home and she texts me back saying we need to talk. She calls me and says in a very quiet and sad voice that she's just not feeling the relationship and i tried convincing her that we should take a few extra days to make sure she still feels this way. She tells me the past week was the few extra days in her opinion. I apparently was perfect and she still thinks I'm cute and she does like me and I do make her happy and that nothing I did has anything to do with her breaking up with me and that she still wants to be friends.


Do you guys think that she's having a period/bipolar meltdown and that she might get over this and come back to me? I really can't tell if she really doesnt like me that way or if shes having a period/bipolar meltdown which is causing her to feel this way. The whole week went so well and her friends and parents loved me and we both made each other feel happy. It all just seems totally random.


Any ideas?


Thanks.

Hey,

You need to take a few steps basck here before you go off the rails over this girl. At the moment, you're wrapped around her finger, so please untie yourself and give her some room. The next time that you hear from her, it won't be you making the contact - it will be HER. Just get on with other things in your life and try not to think about her too much dude. i am VERY serious about this. I have honestly lost count of how many guys I've spioken to hear who have crashed n' burned over girls, and you sem to be building yourself up for the same fate. So, please adhere my advice, will ya?

i left her a voicemail today saying i still like her, i like hanging out with her and she makes me happy, but that if she doesnt want anything more thats cool. I can't make her like me that way if she doesn't and that I can just be friends.

I don't believe you. In fact, I believe that if she doesn't reply to your voicemail, then you'll get more frustrated and will start leaving her more messages. Sorry, but I've been talking to so many guys who have become messed up over girls in this way that Im just a bit restless about it now. You might think that you can handle this, but - if you're the type of guy that I think you are - you can't.

Kevin

you dont believe me about what

He probably doesn't believe you about your ability to disconnect so easily. That's what I'm not believing anyways.

i like how nobody is answering my question which is did she break up with me because she had a bipolar meltdown or because she actuallly isnt into me. is it uncommon for someone whos bipolar to break up with someone irrationally during a meltdown?

For the record i'll answer your question first, IF you infact know she's bipolar, then yes any of the several symptoms of bipolar disorder could have indirectly made her break up with you.

Yeh, i didn't believe in your ability to get yourself out of this situation. You're on the surface peeking into a dark world, and I don't think that anything I say will prevent you from getting yourself into a big mess here. You are VERY welcome to prove me wrong though. Ideally, you should just pack up and leave her, never to be spoken to or seen again. I know that you won't do this though... ...

In answer to your actual question, well, it's an unfair question to ask because you can't say that she left you solely because she isn't into you or solely because she is bipolar. Greatsharkbite is hinting at the right answer, by saying that the bipolar had an indirect cause, but there must also be the case that she simply doesn't like you. Is that such a bad thing? Don't try to rationalise a relationship through the psychology of the other person. When you do that, you miss what love is all about: two people coming together where everything fits perfectly. If it doesn't work, then it doesn't work, and that's just that... ...



Kevin

I just noticed me and Greatsharkbite registered here on the same day! What a coincidence. We should be cyber blood-brothers or something.