bit of a dilema

right i havent been on here in a while, sorry guys i just know that ur not meant to use this forum long term so im trying not to.

basically i while ago maybe some of you might remember i was going to ask a girl out. i did and all was going smoothly for the first few days. until the other day on msn she told me that her and my friend fancied me aswell. to understand why i dont just walk away you have to know some things first.

firstly that that would be hard seeing as i am part of a group of 3 friends and 1 was my girlfriend. if i walked away id have no friends at college.

secondly, she told me that she still likes me in that way and that if she didnt find out what her friend felt then we would still be together. she only broke up with me because she felt like i was to good for her and that i deserved her friend, even though i told her a thousand times i dont like her (and my) friend in that way at all.

basically i still want to go out with her so much and know it could work. she has no confidence at all in herself because of the EXTREMELY $#%^ life she has had so far. she thinks she is ugly, stupid and is convinced everyone hates her. she cant believe i would even want to know her never mind go out with her and thinks i deserve so much better.

i will respect what she says no matter what happens with this and we are still going to be friends. i just want to know how to convince her that she is good enough for me and if not, then just as a friend i want her to acknowledge herself as a human being who deserves respect.

ive tried telling her that in so many ways but its like trying to get a computer to do something it doesnt know how to do, it really just doesnt compute in her head that i could possibly like her the way i do and that she isnt a piece of crap.

any help AT ALL with this would be appreciated so much because this is really killing me to be honest. you can ask me anything you want.

Hey,

I'm really sorry you are going through all of this and I hope it gets better. You seem like a very nice guy to go through all the trouble.

Anyways, have you tried suggesting she go see a therapist about her low self esteem, etc? Maybe let her know that you would be willing to go with her so she will feel more comfortable about it?

In the end, it isn't your battle and people have to want to help themselves, but this might help.

Big hugs!

thanks for that

im going to talk to her tommorrow about it. hopefully, fingers crossed big time, she will come to her senses about all this. if not tho i will probably give her some space for a bit and it might all just clear itself up. no matter what tho im going to convince her even if its just as a friend that she is worth something. and i might mention going to see someone to her if i can, but i dont want to insult or upset her right now so i can just hope that there will be a right moment for it.

thanks for the help. ill tell you what happens if you are interested (you dont have to be )