Some progress

To some things up, was friends with a girl for 2 years, lived 2 hours drive away from each other so didn't see each other much, we chatted on line. She came to live here, I liked her and pursued it, eventually we got in a relationship.

She quit her job on moral grounds, I moved in, knowing it was too soon, she had no income. I lost my job soon after and we soon recovered new jobs.

Soon into the relationship she came on hot and heavy, wanted sex, and a baby, but I was slow to pick up ques. She lost her cat and a few other difficulties in her life and everything seemed put aside.

So I spent over a year living with her in another room, our relationship kissing, hugging, holding hands and some fondling.

Thanks to some good people here I've become very open about what I want in my relationship with her. She's always told me about her broken relationships by abusive/controlling types and thats why she's had difficulty she says I have trouble understanding.

I spent a few conversations telling her what I wanted, how I felt lonely and on the last big one a week ago when I said we move forward soon or move on (I felt I had to be bold at this point), she cried and told me she had been afraid of me leaving her and how she loved me and didn't know how she would take care of things without me. I said I wouldn't leave her stranded on the next rent and she cried harder about how she didn't want to be without me.

So now were sleeping next to each other and shes cool and happy about it. We fought today about how she doesn't like sexy clothing cause she feels it looks slutty. Other then that I said today I wanted to move forward with a sexual relationship in the new year and she got awkward cause its unfamilar territory to her, but I told her its going to be that way until she takes a leap. The most I got when she relaxed into the conversation (after a while) was her cuddling up and saying we'd try and work up to things then and we'll 'see what happens.' i don't want to push too hard so I left it there. To me all these things are part of a normal relationship, but she's never had a normal one. Her last boyfriend controlled everything and she had to fight for everything and he was negative and belitting. I feel she's been with the guy from Sleeping with the Enemy without the phyiscal abuse but everything else. Maybe I should be happy with my progress and see where things go from here.

thanks guys!

I'm 32 and she's 27, she's a virgin.

hi tryingsoul

If she is telling you about her broken relationship, then it means may be she doesn't want to break up relationship with you,anyway. Other thing you should listen to her very carefully and attentively. You should response her and acknowledge her in your best way.

Important thing if she is telling you something with great emotions then you should give her support and in fact it is duty of yours for her for your relationship with her. Look females are always been so emotional, but this doesn't mean that they are so weak. You need to understand her. Not only, also she need to understand you.

Normal thing in relationship is fighting, it is obvious. But keep in mind don't make it too bigger that it can start ruining your relationship.

Thnks



If you have more queries then you are welcome.