My last relationship and the problems i face after its end

Hello. First i would like to say "hi". I'm a new member here.
I will try to describe my last relationship (and my most imporant one) using sections..

1. Basic information on who we are
Both 25yr olds, zodiac sign Aries.Egoists.Competitive types.With low-self esteem and insecurities.Hungry for love.
Me: still a student,just before my first career/postgraduate academic step,with some self-confidence,but not entirely built due to the fact that i'm still living with my folks and not having a personal income. With no serious relationship until then.(maybe one) No serious bonding maybe most of the times due to fear of abandonment. Searching for the ultimate passion and love. Single for a while.(year or more) Really romantic.Living in my home country. Bored of my life,friends,environment. Searching for EXCITEMENT. Searching for a girlfriend.
She:Independent,living alone,still studying but also working at a simple job. With lots of self-hate/self-loathing,temper attacks and tantrums. Coming from a different culture (different nation). A bit Introvert. With no serious relationship (except maybe one). Single for a while (a year) Really beautiful, but poor. Divorced parents, alcoholic father. Sexual worries due to problems to orgasm. (insecurities). Suspecting Depression. Staying in my country for a 3month student exchange program.

2. Meeting and first weeks
We met at the University. She was quite HOT for my standards. I didnt even think she liked me. I got her number, and we went out on twice with other people and friends. We firstkissed and got together on the 2nd time. We flirted really nice. Dating people of other cultures and nationalities is really interesting to me. 3rd date we went out alone and the feelings started to kick in.
Next we went for a weekend trip at my cottage. I got panicked into thinking she is going to leave and cried. I got over it. The weekend was perfect. We spent most of the time cuddling. We were both enthousiasts.. Next days she insisted on seeing me on a daily basis, sleeping together and stuff. Soon, "I love you" was said back and forth. And then, sex got better, and better, and better. We talked about how we need each other, how each other helped other one's insomnia or depression. She started throwing hints about marriage and even kids. Like a "joke". I promised i'd follow her to her country cause she couldn't stay in mine due to obligations.

3. Main relationship and problems start to rise
Suddenly, i become a bit anxious about my promises of changing country. Cause i realized i was falling more and more in love and bonding. She was becoming a need for me.
She starts to show signs of weird mood swings. Morning blues, morning temper, extreme irritability. Sex makes those go away.
We start speaking and her self-loathing starts to arrise. She uses names for herself. stupid,retard,fat,ugly.
At the same time, she shows signs of "tiredness" and asking "personal space". Her temper attacks and irritability become worse and worse. Sometimes those are directed towards me. And then my insecurities kick in. Suddenly some of the magic seems lost.

4. The end
2 weeks before she leaves, i tell her to break up. I explain her behaviour and what is bad etc etc. She admits there are problems she admits she also "doesnt respect me" in a way. I'm trying to break it up but she cries and doesn't let me go. Next day we book my airplane tickets.
We continue but after 3-4 days things get worse again. I try to leave her with more personal space but she asks for more. We were alone here cause she didnt have friends so we see each other daily. I get depended on her. When i m not with her i cant eat or sleep well. I try to spend more quality time with her but we seem "locked". I doubt and re-doubt my choice to leave for the other country and she insists she doesnt want to end the relationship and i should go and try etc. Its a big risk for me. I dont' want to be dumped abroad. I hadn't ever faced something even slightly similar to that.
She flies away and i try to calm. She doesnt communicate that much (1 sms per day or less) I get more panicked and decide it's not working. I break up. She immediately responds again with positive feelings...... we make up again... and break up again.. She admits "she was tired towards the end" "i suppressed her and the relationship and made it hard to breathe".
After lots of changing opinions i decide to go there and i announce her so. One week and something goes by OK. There is some communication and even some good 'i miss you' 'i want to see you' msgs. I'm happy again i believe it will work. As my flight day approaches she sais she's 'worried' about my sudden change of mind. Next days we have a fight. Her temper arrised again and i responded by jealousy and passion. I get jealous. I apologise. We have a phone call. She implies "i ll got for this month and it wont work out after that so it's just a good bye trip". She sais she's afraid i won't make it there because the situation will be more stressfull. She still insists on me going though.
I cancel everything. I take the most difficult decision in my life. My decision meant breaking up once and for all.

5. Post breakup
Very Difficult times. No contact with her except two times. First she blames me for being weak and not having the courage to follow her. Then she sais what she wanted was not to contact so much until i get there so that she missed me more. Then at the 2nd time we spoke she said she "wonders how we even made it for 3 months" . She sais i couldnt accept her temper attacks that she always had. And she couldn't accept my whining. (yes i complain a lot..) I explain to her that her temper attacks were above normal. She sais we have to find someone that accepts our flaws/faults. I strongly disagree.
Almost two months after my decision, still thinking about her. She sais she tries to move on and acts ignorant and 'cool'. She sais she makes plans for the future. I have my way of knowning she still thinks about me... even a bit.
I doubt over my decision to not follow her. What if she was the "one" ?
I know i have to mature and become more strong and independent. I know i have to take responsibilities.

6. Emotional/Psychological background facts

my strong need to live alone and move abroad even before i met her may influence how fast i took the decision to announce "i ll follow"
my fixation on having a girlfriend/relationship may influence how fast i fell in love
her big "hunger" for love as she said, made her blind. "blinded by love" "love is blind".
my insecurities and fixation on complaining when things dont go as i want
her insecurities as a woman and personality. her self-disgust . Maybe making her seeking reassurance from relationships.
she admitted having lots of EX boyfriends. she couldn't remember a number. although , relationships didn't last. strange? ref flag?
how much she pleasured sex for the first time made things seem better than they were
the 3month timelimit maybe influenced both of us on doing mistakes and be anxious

Hi, miss_me! It sounds to me like you both rushed into things, really. You don't have to go where she lives or try to be with her, to have a girlfriend. If this is causing you pain, maybe it's not worth it, or you guys need a break from each other. It might be that both of you are lonely so you cling to this relationship. Moving to another country is a big step.

Hello..
I think it's a bit silly on my behalf to try to ask others conclusions for something i lived but hey.. it feels kindda better..

The truth is, i'm afraid that my need for a relationship drove her away a bit...
I'm thinking if i was more cool about it it could continue..
I was going to go there for a month or so and then we were planning something more permanent for the winter...

I'm also worried that i have Fear of Abandonment [syndrome?].
I was trying to get from her more and more feelings and she didn't gave so i was more and more afraid of the possibility it would end..

It is ok to have this fear, miss_me. You were ok before you met her, right? Taking some time to think if you want the relationship or not even being with her won't destroy your life.
Maybe you can pay her a visit at some point and see how you feel about each other.
We all need to talk about what we're going through sometimes.