Loner meets girl...

Im a dude, and 20 years old already. Yet Ive never had a relationship with anyone. Ive only recently been mentally evaluated as paranoid and im getting help for it. But relationships are a foreign land to me. Ive always been distant and unattached to anyone, but recently I met a girl online who says she really likes me, and I really like her too. I want to meet her, but I dont want her to know the real me, I havent told her anything about it either.
Anyway, when im talking to her through txt and msn, I can be quite charming, funny etc..But I just know if i met her in real life Id revert to the real me, the one that freezes up in panic and mumbles jibberish and starts twitching. My instinct tells me to push her away so I wont get hurt, but in my mind I know I need to confront the problem head on and risk it for happiness. She says shes coming here to my country next year or so, so its no immediate concern, Im just looking for a bit of advice, perhaps from someone wise or someone whos been there done that..

The most common scenario for somebody in your situation is: you have already married her (in your imagination), built a house with her, had kids and are getting ready to retire. Meanwhile, she is just thinking that you are one of the thirty guys she has met online. She hopes you are taller (or shorter), less (or more) assertive, etc.

The more you try to trick her now (by hiding things) the less likely you are to impress her if the relationship ever progresses.

You say "but in my mind I know I need to confront the problem head on and risk it for happiness. " That attitude gives you the best chance of success. Since you come across as an honest type, the question is probably more of how do you communicate your issues in a way that does not scare her away.

I dont think she has 30 other guys online. Shes quite honest and it was actually her that came to me, before I really started to know her, she was just "the one of thirty girls i met online".
But shes definitely grown on me, she has the nicest personality, and shes one of the few girls ive ever thought of as funny AND shes good looking, yet modest.

I guess ill tell her, I dont think shell be too shocked, she does already wonder why im unemployed and single and stuff like that, might as well give her the truth.

Tell her about it, bluntly, if shes a good friend she won't be scared off. You are charming and funny, your problem is your paranoia around people. Remember you are capable of not only normal interaction, but your a very like-able character. Don't doubt yourself so much.

I am very similar to you and have had similar experience with a girl. I'm still waiting to see how that turns out though.

I'm a girl, so from my point of view, i think alot of girls are understanding if you have any personal problems, so its best to talk to her about it first. and in the worst case, if it turns out she doesn't like you for that reason, you're better off finding someone who can understand you better.

If she is as kind as you say she is, then she will understand. Most girls would, i believe. If she cares about you, then i believe she would walk with you through anything. One thing to be aware of though, and i dont want to sound too negative about this, most of the time when people have online chemestry and they have talked online for extended periods of time, they create a fantasy. They put that person on a pedistal, and sometimes by meeting someone you risk ruining the magic of the fantasy. I am not saying you guys wont become extreemly close friends, but dont expect too much more than that. It is possible though, but just remain honest with her. She could resent it if you lie to her.

Take it easy bud, it's all okay.

There are plenty of secrets she probably hasn't told you about herself either. Test the waters, let it out a little bit at a time, my guess is she'll probably bite and relate to you...you may have more in common than you think.

Be comfortable in your own skin and change nothing about yourself for others, do it for yourself so that you will feel the way YOU want to feel, for whatever reason.
Also, have fun. If things are kept so serious in life the stress levels just continue to skyrocket. Lessening the stress by keeping light-hearted as often as possible, and serious when needed, will keep things fun, refreshing, and relaxing during the course of your relationship.
I think that this, paired with hard work, is valuable in finding a balanced approach to different aspects of life.