I have a trust issues with my girlfriend (kinda long)

I've been dating my girlfriend for a year and a half now. She has never given me a real reason not to trust her, but that hasn't stopped me from having trust issues with her. She is really so amazing and understanding when I confront her about these problems. This last Tuesday I was hanging out with her, and she was texting someone and I came up behind her and wrapped my arms around her. As soon as I did, she closed her phone. To me it looked like she was hiding who she was talking to. I then walked into the other room and sat down for about 5 mins. I came back and she asked me what was wrong. I told her, and she pulled out her phone and said look at it. I refused because I know I need to get over these problems. But in the back of my mind I thought "well she only offered cause while I was in the other room, she was deleting them." I apologized for what I had thought and said, and then we went to have dinner and watch a movie. When we got back she went home and we talked on the phone for a while and I asked if she needed to go to sleep cause it was late. She told me no and we talked for about two more minutes. She got a text and then she told she had to go because she was tired. I let her go, and then I called her back 30 seconds later and she didn't answer. I then proceeded to call her several times. About 13. Ugh. She finally answered, and I told her my concerns. She then yelled at me saying that I had ruin a great evening and she was so angry at me for doing that twice in the same day.
The next day she didn't call me in the morning like she normally does. We texted back and forth while I was at work and I nearly lost her. I told her I would never ever do that again. That night we went to dinner and while we were there, she kept texting her friend Max and she told me he was interested in her friend. But I just got this wrenching feeling in my stomach that just tore me apart. We went back to my house where her car was and I told her I was sad about that day and how I thought I'd almost lost her and I cried in her arms. She told me she could never and would never leave me. That night we talk some on the phone and I cried more. I went to sleep in what I could only call an anxiety attack. I just keep freaking out and I can't stop now. I talk to her on the phone and she keeps texting someone and it's driving me crazy cause I think she's hiding something though she has never given me any concrete reason not to trust her. What's wrong with me? I worry that it may be some emotional problem I have. Or something wrong with my head that's creating all these crazy scenarios. My imagination is out of control and is making up all sorts of things that make me think she's hiding something. I don't want to lose her, please help me.

Hi, ijrule. Welcome to the forum. You might be over reacting and she may not be cheating on you, but this could be happening becouse she is ignoring you. She should give her attention to you when you're out to dinner, not send messages on her phone. I think something like that would make me a bit insecure too.
Maybe it is an emotional problem for you, if you think your reaction is too much. You could be scared that you will be abandoned and it could come from a fear you had when you were a kid.
Perhaps someone important in your life didn't give you all the attention you needed and you were afraid that they would leave you.

i dont blame you for not trusting her, thats suspicious behaviour


i might be wrong, im just basing this on my previous experience when my bf did the same thing
and its better to find out faster rather than later when youve grown more attatched
being caught by suprise with cheating is really horrid

you sound like hard work as a boyfriend. Instead of confronting her EVERY SINGLE TIME you get paranoid, just hold your tongue, because she'll get sick of it very quickly. If you're worrying THAT MUCH then call a friend or do something to distract yourself, because constant suspicion is so hard to put up with in a relationship, and you really are driving her away.

Wow, I forgot I posted this.

I thought I'd log in and post an update. Turns out she was cheating on me.

I looked back on it now and realize I was too clingy and required lots of attention. I was very insecure with myself and still am a bit, but the more concentrate on what's important for me to succeed in life and keeping that my main focus, the more confidences I build. I feel that will in turn attract the right kind of person I'm looking for.

Thank you all for the responses.
J

Hi! It sucks that she really was cheating.. I'm glad you have found a healthy way of thinking, good for you. Thanks for checking in