ARGH, this is killing me!

Sorry, guys, I don't mean to bug anybody, but I need someone, anyone, to say something to this.

http://psychforums.com/viewtopic.php?t=20334

Please read this -- and please HELP ME! I've realized they are only two -- TWO! -- people I've confided this in, one of whom I barely even see anymore. And they don't even have a clue how hard this really is for me, cause I've been keeping it to myself and I've got no one to talk to about this. Everyone thinks I'm the clown, it's going up, and, fair enough, it is, it HAS. When I remember where I was a year ago, it's like I've risen from the dead. But I'm lonely still. And I'm asking myself, why is it that the thing I desire the most... just won't come. How much longer can I go about my days, FUNCTIONING?
He doesn't answer me anymore, but that's not what's so painful. I miss him so much and he's all I think about and there's this ache in my heart and I don't know what to do and I think I love him, and and and...

It hurts, you know.

Know where your are coming from friend. It seems to me it would be best to forget and move along. Why go through so much pain over someone that it looks only causes you pain. There are so many more out there...

I know its hard, and you have only yourself to relay on and really evaluate what is truly the best way to go with this. I am sure you have a little voice that is trying to direct you on the right path.

I am no one to tell you what to do, but I feel your pain dude. I do.

Thx for replying. Maybe the pain is better than feeling nothing at all. Shows me I'm still capable of emtion.

Sometimes I think, "what the heck? The world's not gonna stop turning", and then I really feel like just telling him the truth. But then again, I'm afraid, and if he doesn't even reply to me at all, what's the use? Scaring him away and risking never seeing him again, when there is still the off-chance that we might meet again?

Time only will tell. And this, like everything else, too will pass.

dude i know where your coming from, i had the same thing happen a little less than a year ago.
What i did was, i distracted myself from thinking about what was, and preoccupied myself with doing things i enjoyed, even if i didnt want to at the time, after a while, i relally got into it and i almost completely forgot about all the bad feelings. And now i am with the most wonderfully awesome guy that loves me for me.
The heart heals, it is relentless! even though it may feel like it sometimes, its not dead, just in reconstuction.
kinda like a zombie you might say,... it will rriiiiiisssee agaaaaaiin!!! lol you just gotta let it.

Have faith and dont give in. YOU'LL BE FINE!!!!
HANG IN THERE!!!!