I feel like I'm annoying everyone

Not sure if this is for here but I really need to share, otherwise I will explode!

Me and my partner are getting married this year so we are preparing the wedding along with working full time. I think you'd all understand that we are excited about it but we try not to talk about it too much in front of other people because we realise that the wedding is not the most important thing in other people's lives! Don't get me wrong, we're not hiding anything but we don't share cheesy posts on Facebook about just having tried sample cakes or just getting the rings purchased etc.

But I feel like my friends could be a tiny bit more excited. I feel like I'm annoying them when I start talking to them about whatever, not just for the wedding. They are my bridesmaids and a few days ago I asked them what kind of make up they would like so I can tell the make up artists and they all just went "whatever", one of them didn't even bother to respond even though she saw the message.

I've never had many friends, I've always been a private person and have a very tight circle of friends which is constantly shrinking. Before I had about 10 friends and now I have 4! The other people in my life are not classed as friends, more like acquaintances. My friends don't make an effort with me unless I make an effort with them, if that makes sense. I always have to be the one to call/text/message them. They go out together and post photos together but don't bother inviting me. I've said many times "I was free that day" just to kind of make them realise that I'm feeling left out but nothing happens. They don't even ask how I'm doing, even though I always ask them!

Lately though I've stopped making an effort and I feel like I'm losing them but I'm not even sorry, I think the wedding showed me who my real friends are. I've always thought a friendship is a two way street.It was my birthday a few days ago and I got about 5 messages - all from my family and partner! No one else seemed to give a s*** that it was my birthday. I wasn't expecting balloons and cake but at least a little happy birthday text would have gone a long way! Whereas I always send my friends cards and small gifts just to make them feel special. But I just feel like I'm the only one making an effort here and it just makes me feel I'm annoying them, I wish I could just fob them off and tell them not to come to the wedding but then on my side, there would be just my small family and 0 friends. In comparison, my partner has invited about 60 friends and they are all coming and are extremely excited! But my friends couldn't care less!

How do I shake this feeling that I'm annoying them? Is it possible that they are envious? I know that sounds really stuck up but sometimes I feel like they hate the fact I'm happy and try their best to belittle this. My mum's always said once you grow out of a certain situation in your life, you change your friends and I think she's right - I met these people in uni 5 years ago and a lot has changed since then.

Hello and welcome!

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I think I agree with you mom- it sounds as if these friends are dropping away from you. I've never been one to be put out about things like my birthday, but if you do things, and they never do in return, then I'd have to ask myself also, just how much they're my friends.

I think just stick things out until after the wedding might be a good plan, then if these acquaintances wish to fall away, then they do. I'm not going to force anyone to like me, or be around me, you know?