Ending a 5 year relationship.

Hello everyone,


After 5 years of a toxic relationship it's over and I am with a wonderful man who treats me like a queen, but the fact the my ex doesn't care at all that it's over bothers me no emotion at all. He is also bashing me all over town. I am no angel but I did not do half the things he is spreading around. Should this even bother me ? Is this normal ?

Chunkymonkey93 wrote:but the fact [that] my ex doesn't care at all that it's over bothers me[.]

... there was something in this relationship for you, however, not for him. that this is apparent makes you question your judgement.

Chunkymonkey93 wrote:but I did not do half the things he is spreading around.

... so, he does care after all. he cares enough to try to hurt you.

i really wish i could remember who said this ...

SAY WHAT YOU WILL, YOU CAN ONLY SPEAK OF YOURSELF.

... and so it is that he's doing a great job of showing everyone how vindictive he is. and, should they know him well enough, they'll know he's lying too.

Chunkymonkey93 wrote:Should this even bother me ?

... probably not. you don't mention any 'functional effect'.

Chunkymonkey93 wrote:Is this normal ?

... norms are for people that like labels. a better question would be 'is it smart', and of that i'd say wasting your energy on negative outcomes is never smart.